Quotes About Support

said Chericola got a ball club that couldn't whip the Little Sisters of the Poor. I said if the entire town turned out for every game it couldn't support a hopscotch team. I said you're on some kind of religious bender and I'm stumbling around like a goddam zombie wondering what's going on.

The school discipline program isn't working for the kids who aren't doing well and isn't needed by the kids who are.

If your child isn't following through, it's probably not because she won't but because she can't.

I've noticed that it's been difficult for you to stick with the thirty-minute time limit on playing video games. What's up?

Some adults, having now made some headway toward understanding their kids' concerns, have difficulty resisting the temptation to revert to form by being dismissive or offering solutions, thereby ending the problem-solving process.

How the problem is affecting the kid (health, safety, learning) How the problem is affecting others (health, safety, learning)

I wonder if there's a way for us to help you find the words to start each section . . ." (that was the kid's concern) ". . . and still make sure you get some practice at doing that so it won't always be so hard for you and so that you can express your really good ideas" (that was the adult's concern).

While it's tempting to focus on your child's behaviors, in this book we'll be focusing instead on the expectations they are having difficulty meeting that are causing those behaviors. That crucial distinction is going to make a world of difference.

But whether a child's concerning behavior is lucky or unlucky, it's communicating the exact same thing: I'm stuck . . . there's an expectation I'm having difficulty meeting.

Your child is lacking skills, not motivation.

There's an excellent video of full-class Plan B on the Lives in the Balance website.

And it's a lot easier when your kid is your partner instead of your enemy.

What behaviors does your child exhibit when that happens? Some kids cry, or pout, or sulk, or withdraw. While that's the "easy" end of the spectrum, those kids still need our help. Some hold their breath, scream, swear, kick, hit, have panic attacks, or destroy property. Some run away, bite, cut themselves, vomit, use weapons, or worse. This end of the spectrum is much more concerning and dangerous.

kids do well if they can.

Just like the rest of us, they do poorly when life demands skills they're lacking. What behaviors does your child exhibit when that happens? Some kids cry, or pout, or sulk, or withdraw. While that's the "easy" end of the spectrum, those kids still need our help. Some hold their breath, scream, swear, kick, hit, have panic attacks, or destroy property. Some run away, bite, cut themselves, vomit, use weapons, or worse. This end of the spectrum is much more concerning

He's not motivated. If it's true that kids do well if they can, then the kid is already motivated and needs something else from us besides rewards and punishments. Remember, if the kid could do well he would do well, so poor motivation is unlikely to be what is truly keeping him from doing well. Rewards and punishments don't teach lagging thinking skills and don't solve the problems that precipitate challenging episodes.

behaviors simply indicate that your child is having difficulty meeting certain expectations

The vast majority of kids I've worked with over the years had already endured more than their fair share of consequences. If all those consequences were going to work, they would have worked a long time ago.

Mi queridísima Leigh, al margen de lo que pase, recuerda siempre, siempre, que todos los días hay que hacerle saber a persona que amas lo mucho que la quieres, y todo irá bien.

For the WriterChicks…a brain trust without equal, a circle of friends who never let go, and women I love with my whole heart.

The people you love and the people who love you, no matter how piss-poor a job they do of showing it, are all you have in this life.

A good friend is like a four-leaf clover…'" "'Hard to find and lucky to have

the home team: my dearest, most patient, most beloved husband, Rich, who does everything so that I can do

Because you're only as happy as your least-happy child.