Quotes About Emotional

The more opportunity I have to treat people the way I wished I myself had been treated, the better I feel.

They may vacillate between over-involvement and neglect, depending upon their moods and emotional needs at the moment. They may only pay attention to the children when the kids are doing something to meet the borderline parents' needs. Some parents with BPD try to cope with their own feelings of inadequacy by demanding that their children be perfect. Children may then feel worthless when something goes wrong.

Borderline rage is usually intense, unpredictable, and unaffected by logical argument. It is like a torrential flash flood, a sudden earthquake, or a bolt of lightning on a sunny day. And it can disappear as quickly as it appears.

If, as is more likely, your loved one has the unconventional form of BPD, they may insist that everyone else is the problem. They will have no interest in therapy, and they will be verbally and emotionally abusive. There is a 99 percent chance that they will DARVO: deny, attack, reverse, claim victimhood, and make you into the offender.

For the first time, I understood on a gut level that those years of unprovoked emotional assaults weren't really about me. They probably resulted from his own sense of shame and his intense fears of being abandoned. The discovery that he was a victim, too, turned some of my anger into compassion.

Your feelings need to be validated just as much as those of the person with BPD.

Unfortunately, many adults grew up with damaged, trampled, or nonexistent boundaries. In many cases, parents routinely violated their children's boundaries and rights or forced them into inappropriate roles. Different kinds of boundary violations cause different kinds of problems for children when they become adults:

But who are you? As the child of a parent with BPD and/or other emotional and cognitive difficulties, it may be surprisingly difficult to answer this question. You likely didn't have much mirroring, or validation, when you were young, which babies need in order to know where they stand in the world, that their feelings and observations and perceptions are healthy and normal. Without that early mirroring, it was difficult to see yourself, to know yourself…

This is why, no matter how many times you reassure them, they can't accept your reassurance. Meanwhile, the black hole inside them never gets filled.

Linehan echoes this belief, often saying that people with BPD are like people with third-degree burns over 90 percent of their body. Lacking emotional skin, they feel agony at the slightest touch or movement.

Borderlines with abusive backgrounds may be replaying scripts from the past.

Many distortion campaigns seem to revolve around either real or perceived abandonment, loss, and rejection

Now he and other former allies, such as newspaper publisher Oswald Garrison Villard, began to question Roosevelt's emotional stability and subsequently the leadership of Washington, who continued to remain loyal to him.

It's not what you carry, but how you can learn to carry it. You need to heal yourself. Your child self too, Anna. Make room for her. Find a way to let her in.

Perhaps I will begin by walking where he has walked." Arap

He's like a human bomb with dozens of trip wires. Some of them I can see, but most are deeply inside him.

When his weight was on me fully, and I could feel every bump and contour of the roof against my shoulders and hips through the blankets, there were moments of pure crushing happiness I knew I'd never forget. It was as if we'd pressed ourselves together until his bones passed through mine and we were the same person, ever so briefly.

you can't really love other people well unless you are at home in your own soul. You will simply be too afraid.

The lack of emotional security of our American young people is due, I believe, to their isolation from the larger family unit. No two people - no mere father and mother - as I have often said, are enough to provide emotional security for a child. He needs to feel himself one in a world of kinfolk, persons of variety in age and temperament, and yet allied to himself by an indissoluble bond which he cannot break if he could, for nature has welded him into it before he was born.

Several researchers have found that the pressures that Black men and boys experience exact a toll on their (our)1 psychological and emotional well-being. How they respond to these pressures is undoubtedly a factor that contributes to the high rate of interpersonal violence between and among Black males.

With insecure attachments, "a child unwittingly memorizes the precise lesson of that troubled relationship: that love is suffocation, that anger is terrifying, that dependence is humiliating, or one of a million crippling variations.

As we have become more open minded (tolerant) in society we have become more closed hearted.

American Psychological Association, the girlie-girl culture's emphasis on beauty and play-sexiness can increase girls' vulnerability to the pitfalls that most concern parents: depression, eating disorders, distorted body image, risky sexual behavior.

When things are shaky and nothing is working, we might realize that we are on the verge of something. We might realize that this is a very vulnerable and tender place, and that tenderness can go either way. We can shut down and feel resentful or we can touch in on that throbbing quality. (9)