Quotes About Television

A reality show isn't unlike the Nobel Peace Prize, then," Mr. Bennet said. "In that they both require nominations.

Since Liz's adolescence, when viewing television commercials that celebrated the ostensibly unconditional love of mothers for their children, or on spotting merchandise in stores that honored this unique bond with poems or effusive declarations—picture frames, magnets, oven mitts—she had felt like a foreign exchange student observing the customs of another country.

This is the day of dramatisation. Merely stating a truth isn't enough. The truth has to be made vivid, interesting, dramatic. You have to use showmanship. The movies do it. Television does it. And you will have to do it if you want attention.

My memory of that day is like television itself, sharp and clear but unreliable.

Grandma turned her TV to thunderous volume and told me I mumbled. She was still an "Edge of Night" fan. Sometimes I'd grab a Coke from the refrigerator and slump down on the couch with her, slurping intentionally from the bottle. "I hope you don't sit like that in school," she said. "It's unladylike.

I kept changing the station, over and over around the dial, but all I got were those two channels, or snow. I had spent half my life watching TV. I thought again about the paperweight. I'd had it less than a week when I shook too hard and accidentally sent it flying across my bedroom where it hit the floor and cracked. Leaked, became useless. At the time, it was my biggest tragedy—breaking that paperweight.

Evenings after the dishes, Grandma hobbled around the house with her frayed prayer book which was held together with rubber bands. Then she'd settle in front of the television to watch her westerns—"Bonanza," "Rawhide"—while I sat out at the kitchen signing corny get-well cards to Ma and pages of complaints to Jeanette.

Ma bent over and kissed Grandma, who sat ramrod straight in her chair and didn't respond. "Don't wait up for me, now," Ma laughed. "Do-on't worry," Grandma answered, rolling her eyes at the TV.

Old. I'm almost forty, probably as close now to Mrs. Masicotte's age as I am to the age of my parents as they sat on that lawn, laughing and blowing dandelion puffs at me, smoking their shared Pall Mall cigarettes and thinking Mrs. Masicotte was the answer to their future—that that black-and-white Emerson television set was a gift free and clear of the strings that would begin our family's unraveling.

I spent the remainder of the visit staring stupidly at the TV, answering Grandma's questions in single syllables and making faces at her cooking.

Without the pictures seducing you, TV was just a powerless talking ghost.

I was on the brown plaid sofa, watching TV and Scotch-taping my bangs to my forehead because Jeanette said that kept them from drying frizzy. Across the room on the Barcalounger, my mother was having her nervous breakdown.

The City went to me in a LANDSLIDE, and you know why? Because all it wants is decent television, a bit of spare change for booze, and a blowjob every Saturday night.

Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Don't sit there watching TV without your glasses! Do you want to ruin your eyes?!" "My opthalmologist says that not wearing glasses cannot hurt the eyes even if those glasses are badly needed for adequate vision." "What does your opthalmologist think of the foreign situation?

At that exact moment, Nancy Grace, a CNN legal commentator who combines the nuance of a sledgehammer with the social graces of a harpy..

It's not that there is less information on television than there once was. In fact, there is so much information that "fact" is now defined as something believed by so many people that television notices their belief, and truth is measured by how fervently they believe it.

Modern television evangelists are mostly ignorant men with closed minds who have glimpsed the incredible reach of television – even its political influence – and spend a sizable part of their air time pleading for money.

Television's emergence as the dominant medium of communication gave birth to the slickly marketed health-wealth-and-success gospel rampant in today's church.

Actually, perhaps they're just trying to remind themselves where they are. After all, sitting there with Jeremy [Kyle] and his iridescent pupils glistening before them, confronted by a studio audience so ugly they'd make John Merrick spew down the inside of his face-bag, the poor sods could be forgiven for forgetting they were on national television and starting to believe they were somewhere in the bowels of hell instead.

He [Piers Morgan] looks like a teddy bear with Bell's palsy concentrating hard on accurately shitting in an egg cup.

Did I say 'aspect ratio'? Yes I did. And if you don't have a clue what I'm talking about, there's a very good chance your television at home is set to the wrong aspect ratio, in which case I'd like you to stop reading right now and punch yourself hard in the kidneys.

TV news is quite probably the most superficial form of journalism ever invented. Hunter Thompson characterized it fifty years ago as a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free and good men go to die.

I found a snake in my yard, and got a shovel and whacked the hell out of it. Then I didn't have cable for a week.