Quotes About Communication

Briefing is terse, factual and to the point. Reading is untidy, discursive and perpetually inviting. Briefing closes down a subject, reading opens it up.

Rachel was becoming adept at sensing when something was going unsaid by adults: it was as if there were an invisible object sitting amid their visible words and Rachel was learning to judge its shape and size by feel alone.

No, in the end what persuaded me was simply Ã¢â'¬Â¦ that he had asked me. My father would have made such a decision on his own and only informed my mother after the fact. That Jae-sun sought my opinion—my consent—meant more to me than I could say. And because of that, I could not gainsay him this job.

Less explanation is more convincing than more explanation.

Tú eres responsable de tu acción, pero la otra persona lo es de su interpretación de la misma y de su subsiguiente experiencia.

No response is a response.

Communications can be precise and exacting while still being tragically wrong.

Say nothing," Essada suggested. "It makes you more tolerable.

Putting his lips together David whistled a few soft, carefully modulated notes. Head cocked to one side, the alien watched and listened. Then it exhaled softly, trying to duplicate the sounds. Since it possessed a very different respiratory mechanism, it failed in the attempt. That did not matter to David. What was important and what prompted him to tears was the fact that the creature *tried*.

In loquaciousness lay insanity.

I've found that most people do a lot of talking and they wind up not saying very much. Especially adults when they're talking to children. It's kind of like they enjoy talking at you but not to you. They want you to listen to them all the time, but they don't want to listen to you. I think that's pretty stupid. Just because you're small doesn't mean you don't have some important things to say.

The trouble with computers, she thought, was that they had no intuitive senses. Only deductive ones. You had to ask the right question.

I've never known a storyteller who was unhappy when telling stories.

place they had talked. And if the many kudos to the

His only fear then was that the man might shoot first and ask questions later. Thankfully, he did not.

You smile too much, Rey.

The central idea in this book is that highly aroused, negative emotion—dysregulated emotion—is the core problem for high-conflict couples and that there are specific skills partners can learn to manage their emotions effectively, which in turn makes effective communication (accurate expression followed by understanding and validation) possible.

And, finally, how others respond to us—particularly people we are close to—shapes the direction of our emotion in very important ways. Certain responses, such as understanding and validating our experience, soothe our frayed emotional edges, but others, such as criticizing or invalidating our experience, are like salt in an open wound in our hearts.

Thus, being dysregulated is not the same as being upset. You can be upset and still be quite able to make effective decisions, hold your tongue, or otherwise "control" yourself—manage to act in ways that help you achieve a better relationship, a better life, rather than simply escaping an unpleasant (or even awful) situation by doing something that hurts the other person, escalates the conflict, or, in general, makes things worse in the long run.

Conversely, a person with low emotional sensitivity can sometimes have a really hard time intuitively understanding what another person is feeling. This person may need to have a lot more explaining and more direct and specific requests in order to be emotionally supportive and responsive. Low emotional sensitivity can leave a spouse or partner feeling misunderstood or even lead to falsely (but understandably) believing that the other person doesn't care about him or her.

Thus, big reactions (high reactivity) can communicate more clearly what a person is feeling, but also can result in the person sometimes reacting too quickly, getting upset or even dysregulated before all the information has become available. This can sometimes be counterproductive, of course: if reactivity had been lower, the person's response might have been quite different and more productive.

if we are able to describe the situation, what we want, what is happening, and legitimize the emotional process even when we do not like it, typically our emotional arousal will start the return toward a lower state of emotional upset and eventually back to normal emotional arousal

Of course, it is painful when your partner verbally attacks you. Recognize that by responding in kind, you are almost guaranteeing more volleys in your direction, the negative cycle will continue, and you will find no peace.

Diplomats tell lies to journalists and then believe what they read.