Quotes About Irony

How many software developers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, it's a hardware problem.

the painful irony of your mother fighting for inclusion that doesn't include you is still decades away.

Maybe they know what I know, that the true way to a man's heart is six inches of metal between his ribs. Sometimes four inches will do the job, but to be really sure, I like to have six. Funny how phallic objects are always more useful the bigger they are. Anyone who tells you size doesn't matter has been seeing too many small knives.

An atheist waving a cross at a vampire was a truly pitiful sight.

I know the universe has a sense of irony, and sometimes you get reminded just how sadistic that can be.

Who would have ever thought I'd be afraid of a zombie, any kind of zombie? Nicely ironic that.

Please, I always use fresh sarcasm, never canned.

all I can say of the matter, is—That he has either a pumkin for his head—or a pippin for his heart,—and whenever he is dissected 'twill be found so.

I want to make a memorial for our turkey. Never has a bird been so tortured to provide such a lousy dinner.

Neither one of them has toilet paper stuck to her boots. Where is the justice?

You are basically a flophouse and a pimp away from Pepcid rehab, you know that? I informed Nana.

Great system: the poison and the antidote come in the same bottle

If she ever knew me at all she must later have discovered that for those of us who feel deeply and who are at all conscious of the inextricable tangle of human thought there is only one response to be made—ironic tenderness and silence.

he had discovered for himself the uselessness of having opinions and in consequence made a habit of usually saying the opposite of what he thought in a joking way. He was an ironist, hence he appeared often to violate good sense: hence too his equivocal air, the apparent frivolity with which he addressed himself to large subjects. This sort of serious clowning leaves footmarks in conversation of a peculiar kind. His little sayings stayed like the pawmarks of a cat in a pat of butter.

for those of us who feel deeply and who are at all conscious of the inextricable tangle of human thought there is only one response to be made — ironic tenderness and silence.

King Abdullah has died. A divisive figure in the Middle East. The sad irony is that the USA preached democracy in the face of absolute rule.

The funniest people are the saddest once

It is unbelievably sad and ironic that the first victims of global warming are almost all going to come from places that are producing virtually none of the problem.

What a sad business is being funny!

Ah, ladies and gentlemen, a man lives a sad life when he cannot take anything or anyone seriously.

You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm. It's really funny.

All great humorists are sad... I cannot help seeing beyond the tinsel of humour, and recognising the pitiful basis of jest - the world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind.

It's both funny and sad which seem to me to be the two basic ingredients of good comedy.

I'm sad, but I'm laughing.