Quotes About Relationships

Of course, anger serves another function—it pushes people away and keeps them from getting close enough to see you. I wonder if John needs people to be angry at him so that they won't see his sadness.

The only problem is, by choosing familiar partners, people guarantee the opposite result: they reopen the wounds and feel even more inadequate and unlovable.

She still equates feeling loved not with peace or joy but with anxiety.

Well, sure, the vows say "in sickness and health" and "for better or worse" and all that, but that's kind of like clicking okay to the terms and conditions when you download an app or sign up for a credit card. You don't think any of that is going to apply to you.

I told Greenwald that I didn't consider these factors when I was ten years younger and waiting for just the right guy to pop into my life. It seemed reasonable to think that the longer I searched, the better the guy I'd end up with. But it's faulty logic, she said: The longer you wait, the less likely you are to find someone better than you've already met.

I'm mindful of the fact that Very Angry People aren't Very Approachable.

But sometimes without realizing it, we are choosing to be in relationships with people who fit into an old story, or we are choosing to respond to them based on an unhealthy script.

In fact, Wendell continues, I've lost more than my relationship in the present. I've lost my relationship in the future. We tend to think that the future happens later, but we're creating it in our minds every day. When the present falls apart, so does the future we had associated with it. And having the future taken away is the mother of all plot twists. But if we spend the present trying to fix the past or control the future, we remain stuck in place, in perpetual regret.

But John often took note of my appearance: "Now you're looking more like a real mistress" (when I got highlights in my hair); "You better watch out, some people might see some cleavage" (when I wore a V-neck blouse); "Are those your fuck-me shoes for after work?" (when I wore heels). Each time, I'd try to talk about his "jokes" and the feelings underlying them.

Cuando caes en la compasión del idiota, evitas agitar las aguas para no lastimar a otra persona, aunque las aguas necesiten ser agitadas y tu compasión acabe resultando más perjudicial que tu sinceridad.

Late-in-life love has the benefit of being especially forgiving, generous, sensitive — and urgent.

When working with couples on empathy, often I'll say, "Before you speak, ask yourself, What is this going to feel like to the person I'm speaking to? " I make a mental note to share this with John one day.

You will inevitably hurt your partner, your parents, your children, your closest friend—and they will hurt you—because if you sign up for intimacy, getting hurt is part of the deal.

If, however, your childhood ruptures didn't come with loving repairs, it will take some practice for you to tolerate the ruptures, to stop believing that every rupture signals the end, and to trust that even if a relationship doesn't work out, you will survive that rupture too.

The number of family secrets is just staggering.

I can't walk away from someone I love without saying 'I love you' one last time. I've known how very much I've loved you for a long time. You think I'm a child and I know nothing about the world or about love. But I know about love. I know about loss. And I know about loneliness, and goodbyes, and about never being able to voice those feelings again. "Perhaps you've said those words, Richard, and don't mean them. But I never have.

And They Lived Happily Ever After Should all men pile their joys up on a single spot, mine would surpass them all. —Juventius

We enter people's lives and then realize we've walked into a deep and long history that shapes and gives form to our every moment.

I had wanted to get married, but I realized now that I never wanted to be a 'wife.

What good was beauty with no one to share it? Alone, beauty was almost cruel.

It was as close as I had ever come to having power over someone, and I equated it with love.

I love men. They Taste like Chicken

FINANCIAL TIP For guys-- buying the stupid flowers when you're supposed to will be way cheaper than what you'll have to buy and do to make up for it if you forget.

The Basic Five are these: (1) a man who can fix things, (2) a man you can dance with, (3) a man who can pay for things, (4) a man you can talk to, and (5) a man to have great sex with. As I said, this is the rudimentary team you need to form, according to our sage adviser. Certainly other functions can be added to suit your more refined tastes, but with this starting lineup, you can at least avoid abject misery.