Quotes About Zaphod

What, are you, crazy?' 'It's a possibility I haven't ruled out yet', said Zaphod quietly. 'I know as much about myself as my mind can work out under its current conditions. And its current conditions are not good.

Zaphod felt he was teetering on the edge of madness and wondered if he shouldn't just jump over and have done with it.

Was there a reason behind it? There would be no point in asking Zaphod, he never appeared to have a reason for anything he did at all: he had turned unfathomability into an art form. He attacked everything in life with a mixture of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence and it was often difficult to tell which was which.

Zaphod did not want to tangle with them and, deciding that just as discretion is the better part of valor, so was cowardice is the better part of discretion, he valiantly hid himself in a closet.

Marvin started his ironical humming again. Zaphod hit him and he shut up.

He had rather liked Zaphod Beeblebrox in a strange sort of way. He was clearly a man of many quallities, even if they were mostly bad ones.

Marvin, he said, just get this elevator go up will you? We've got to get to Zarniwoop. Why? asked Marvin dolefully. I don't know, said Zaphod, but when I find him, he'd better have a very good reason for me wanting to see him.

Hey this is terrific! Zaphod said. Someone down there is trying to kill us!

Only six people in the Galaxy knew that the job of the Galactic President was not to wield power but to attract attention away from it. Zaphod Beeblebrox was amazingly good at his job.

Impact minus twenty seconds, guys . . ." said the computer. "Then turn the bloody engines back on!" bawled Zaphod. "Oh, sure thing, guys," said the computer.

Oh, and Zaphod? Er, yeah? If you ever find you need help again, you know, if you're in trouble, need a hand out of a tight corner... Yeah? Please don't hesitate to get lost.

Mr. Beeblebrox, sir,' said the insect in awed wonder, 'you're so weird you should be in movies.; 'Yeah,' said Zaphod patting the thing on a glittering pink wing, 'and you, baby, should be in real life.' The insect paused for a moment

The computer started to sing. "'When you walk through the storm …'" it whined nasally, "'hold your head up high …'" Zaphod screamed at it to shut up, but his voice was lost in the din of what they quite naturally assumed was approaching destruction.

But what about the End of the Universe? We'll miss the big moment." "I've seen it. It's rubbish," said Zaphod, "nothing but a gnab gib." "A what?" "Opposite of a big bang.

Only six people in the entire Galaxy understood the principle on which the Galaxy was governed, and they knew that once Zaphod Beeblebrox had announced his intention to run as President it was more or less a fait accompli: he was ideal presidency fodder.*

It might not even have made much difference to them if they'd known exactly how much power the President of the Galaxy actually wielded: none at all. Only six people in the Galaxy knew that the job of the Galactic President was not to wield power but to attract attention away from it. Zaphod Beeblebrox was amazingly good at his job.

According to the legends," he said, "the Magratheans lived most of their lives underground." "Why's that?" said Arthur. "Did the surface become too polluted or overpopulated?" "No, I don't think so," said Zaphod. "I think they just didn't like it very much.

He smiled the smile that Zaphod had wanted to hit and this time Zaphod hit it.

Impact minus twenty seconds, guys …" said the computer. "Then turn the bloody engines back on!" bawled Zaphod. "Oh, sure thing, guys," said the computer. With a subtle roar the engines cut back in, the ship smoothly flattened out of its dive and headed back toward the missiles again.

Why doesn't anyone turn on this Improbability Drive thing?" he said. "We could probably reach that." "What are you, crazy?" said Zaphod. "Without proper programming anything could happen.

Zaphod leaped out of his seat. "Then what's happened to the missiles?" he said. A new and astounding image appeared in the mirrors. "They would appear," said Ford doubtfully, "to have turned into a bowl of petunias and a very surprised-looking whale . . .

I figure this," said Zaphod. "Whatever happened to my mind, I did it. And I did it in such a way that it wouldn't be detected by the Government screening tests.

It turned its heavy eyes on Zaphod and clicked its beak in a desultory fashion. "Go away," said Zaphod. "Okay," muttered the bird morosely and flapped off into the dust again.

Today was the day; today was the day when they would realize what Zaphod had been up to. Today was what Zaphod Beeblebrox's presidency was all about.