Quotes About Theater

My head was a stage wrapped in a curtain of black velvet, and on the stage stood a single actress, named Naomi.

If you ordered up a whore here, you'd probably get a theater major doing Joan Crawford as Sadie Thompson. I wonder what would happen if I ordered up a Hershey bar? His eyes lit up for a moment. I wonder what would happen if I ordered up a whore and a Hershey bar?

If I had to pick one form of acting, it would be live theater. That's where I started; that's where I became a man, I think I'm still finishing up that job.

I hold the world but as the world, Gratiano; A stage where every man must play a part, And mine is a sad one.

I always wanted to play a big, black man, but that would cost too much make-up.

The only way to find the best actor would be to let everybody play Hamlet and let the best man win.

I see too many men delay their exits with a sickly, slow reluctance to leave the stage. It's bad theater as well as bad living.

You should really treat stand-up like you would a play. It's a one-man play.

Well, men go to musicals. Women are the ones that buy the tickets for plays.

I did Shakespeare in college and the nerves I got doing Shakespeare are the same nerves I get doing 'Mad Men.'

Performing a one-man Macbeth feels like the greatest challenge.

My whole background is character acting: weird costumes, fat suits, playing men, playing animals - I've never played anyone with whom there's any overlapping Venn diagram.

I find what I do for a living really funny. I mean, acting is kind of a hilarious thing for a grown man to call a job.

It's what actors call a big, juicy part, when you're a leading man. I don't get a lot of those. I get a lot of supporting things.

Let me play a Man in a scene.

I hate singing. I hate dancing. I enjoyed doing 'Cabaret' and 'Assassins,' but I would wither up and die in 'The Music Man.'

I never wanted to be an actor and to this day I don't. I can't get a handle on it. An actor wants to become someone else. I am a song-and-dance man and I enjoy being myself, which is all I can do.

Actors are con men and con men are actors.

I've decided to just keep doing Oh, Hello, where I play an older man who thinks he's very cultured. That clearly has not gone away.

I'm not much of a song-and-dance man.

I started as a musician, then I was a singer. I sang with the band. Then I was an actor in the theater, TV, films. But I guess I am a song and dance man. It's at the heart of everything I do.

If you'd ever told me that my Broadway debut would be playing Spider-Man, I would have laughed in your face.

The acting is more of a secondary thing for me now. I will be in it, if I'm the best man for the job, but it really is about creating characters and shows.

If you were an actor, anybody could go on Broadway and take a George Carlin hour and do it on stage as a one man show. They're all stand alone essays.