Quotes About Protection

I have no use for bodyguards, but I have very specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants.

I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

My parents were very protective. I couldn't even cross the street without them getting all excited, and placing bets.

If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game.

Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.

Snoring keeps the monsters away.

It is one of those lessons that every child should learn: Don't play with fire, sharp objects, or ancient artifacts.

I want to get non-aerosol mace, you just rub it in. "Dude who is attacking me - come a little closer!"

A sense of humor is needed armor.

Only a true best friend can protect you from your immortal enemies.

I think we ought to raise the age at which juveniles can have a gun.

Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.

That's why ears have cartilage, to keep them from flapping.

I think part of being a parent is trying to kill your kids.

It's not the tales of Stephen King that I've read, I need protection from the things in my head . . .

They say if you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Well, those are precisely the people who need them!

As long as you're a tax deduction, you'll always be safe in my house.

I think humor is like a shield that lets you get as close to the sad sad flame as possible - far closer, oftentimes, than drama.

To give law enforcement the additional tools it needs to track down terror here at home.

It's going to require numerous IRA agents.

My family were hitters. If you made them laugh, they didn't hit you. My dad wouldn't hit me if I got him with humor right between the eyes.

Humor is a great defense, and an offense too. Usually the recipient isn't too happy about it, but the people around are laughing.

It's not the books by Stephen King that I read, I need protection from the things in my head . . .