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We must be conventional, Jack, or we are so cruelly, so vilely misunderstood. Even you, who are a man, cannot say what you think without being misunderstood and vilified
~ George Bernard Shaw
Professor Henry Higgins: She's an owl, sickened by a few days of *my* sunshine.
~ George Bernard Shaw
It is not disbelief that is dangerous to our society; it is belief
~ George Bernard Shaw
You came clothed with the virtue of humility; and because God blessed your enterprises accordingly, you have stained yourself with the sin of pride.
~ George Bernard Shaw
Our language is the language of Shakespeare, Thompson and Milton, as we sit and croon like bilious pigeons.
~ George Bernard Shaw
The road to ignorance is paved with good editors.
~ George Bernard Shaw
You scandalous woman, will you throw away even your hypocrisy?
~ George Bernard Shaw
Boasting about modesty is typical of the English.
~ George Bernard Shaw
Liza. If I cant have kindness, I'll have independence. Higgins. Independence? That's middle class blasphemy. We are all dependent on one another, every soul of us on earth.
~ George Bernard Shaw
So the Gospel is not a message of condemnation as some abusive leaders would have us think but rather a message of freedom and empowerment.
~ George Bloomer
Don't give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.
~ George Carlin
Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
~ George Carlin
California is a small woman saying, 'Fuck me.' New York is a large man saying, 'Fuck you!
~ George Carlin
There are ten thousand people in the United States in a persistent vegetative state. Just enough to start a small town. Think of them as veggie-burghers.
~ George Carlin
I have this real moron thing I do? It's called thinking.
~ George Carlin
George Washington's brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.
~ George Carlin
Catholics are against abortions. Catholics are against homosexuals. But, I can't think of anyone who has less abortions than homosexuals!
~ George Carlin
Motivation is bullshit, if you ask me this country could use a little less motivation. The people who are motivated are the ones who are causing all the trouble! Stock swindlers, serial killers, child molesters, Christian conservatives? These people are highly motivated, highly motivated. I think motivation is overrated, you show me some lazy prick who's lying around all day watching game shows and stroking his penis and I'll show you someone who's not causing any fucking trouble ok?
~ George Carlin
And if they tell you you're not a team player, just congratulate them on being so observant.
~ George Carlin
I protest against any absolute conclusion.
~ George Eliot
Power of generalizing gives men so much the superiority in mistake over the dumb animals.
~ George Eliot
Pity that consequences are determined not by excuses but by actions!
~ George Eliot
Will was not without his intentions to be always generous, but our tongues are little triggers which have usually been pulled before general intentions can be brought to bear.
~ George Eliot
I have never done you injustice. Please remember me," said Dorothea, repressing a rising sob. "Why should you say that?" said Will, with irritation. "As if I were not in danger of forgetting everything else.
~ George Eliot