Quotes About Faith

The truth shall set you free.

A good wife comes from God and a good husband comes from the bank.

The 3 stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus. He doesn't believe in Santa Claus. He is Santa Claus.

I'm not an optimist but hopefully one day I will be.

We turn to God for help when our foundations are shaking only to learn that it is God shaking them.

With soap, baptism is a good thing.

The trouble with some of us is that we have been inoculated with small doses of Christianity which keep us from catching the real thing.

I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.

You must believe in God in spite of what the clergy say.

Atheism is a religion like abstinence is a sex position.

God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he's never on welfare in a mysterious way.

When nobody practices what they strongly believe in, that day will be a triumph of prudence.

Almost everyone has or will experience getting dumped in their lifetime. Unless, of course, you're a nun. Jesus can't dump nuns.

It is good to have friends both in Heaven and Hell?

It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren't, then I'd be a teacher.

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.

God don't make no mistakes. That's how He got to be God.

Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us we're schizophrenic?

Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ

I believe that the Good Lord gave us a finite number of heartbeats and I'm damned if I'm going to use up mine running up and down a street.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

The sun is gonna rise tommorrow.

I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me superman.

I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass.