Quotes About Abuse

Several times in my life, I've sat with women, friends of mine, who reveal, sometimes shyly, sometimes proudly, bruises of one kind or another, and I know I've said, "If it happens one time, leave him," I've said, "It doesn't matter how much you love him. Leave him if it happens one time." And I've said it with utter confidence, as if I knew what the hell I was talking about, as if violence was something that could be easily defined.

Tiger, Tiger, by Margaux Fragoso.

Once a 'Romeo Pimp' has gained a victim's trust, he systematically breaks down her resistance, support systems, and self-esteem. Victims are coerced into submission through gang rape, confinement, beatings, torture, cutting, tattooing, burning, branding, being deprived of basic needs, and threats of murder."   —The State of Human Trafficking in California

The average entry age of American minors into the sex trade is 12-14 years old.

So many people suffer from abuse, and suffer alone.

Anna was pretty sure no one else at the table believed the cold relationship Bran and Leah had was a good thing. It wasn't abusive - not quite. Not physically abusive, anyway. But Anna would have lasted a month, tops, in a relationship where her needs were met with attentive care - and not an ounce of affection.

She needs feeding up. Leo never could take care of the gifts he was given.' 'He wasn't given Anna,' Charles said. 'He hunted her down.' Tag's face stilled. 'He Changed an Omega by force?

I believe the root of all evil is abuse of power.

In a verbally abusive relationship, the partner learns to tolerate abuse without realizing it and to lose self-esteem without realizing it. She is blamed by the abuser and becomes the scapegoat. The partner is then the victim.

Verbal abuse by its very nature undermines and discounts its victim's perceptions.

What blinds people the most to controlling behavior is the belief that the person who consistently defines them truly loves them.

Denial and avoidance are classic abusive behaviors. They're what the abuser is doing when he trivializes and counters his partner's experience

If the words or attitude disempower, disrespect, or devalue the other, then they are abusive.

A poisonous pedagogy is a toxic method of teaching or raising a child. It is a method which controls the behavior of the child by the misuse of Power Over the child. This misuse of power causes the child extreme pain. If the child becomes an adult without having worked through the hurt and pain of the experience, he will perpetuate the misuse of power in adulthood. Consequently, the adult can become toxic or poisonous to others. This toxicity is what we find in abusive relationships.

The partner suffered many wrongs to her spirit. And, she did not know the meaning of her pain. However, because she remained aware of her feelings, she was connected to the spirit of life at her center — the source of her Personal Power. Eventually, it was the power of her feelings and the knowledge of her spirit which enabled her to recognize the abuse and, in so doing, gain Reality II self-esteem.

Verbal abusers block discussions because they are not willing to talk with their mates on an equal basis. The abuser prevents the possibility of mutual support and planning together and so deprives himself and his partner of the many benefits such partnership would bring.

Generally, in a verbally abusive relationship the abuser denies the abuse. Verbal abuse most often takes place behind closed doors. Physical abuse is always preceded by verbal abuse.

Verbal abuse: Words that attack or injure, that cause one to believe the false, or that speak falsely of one.

verbal abuse is an issue of control, a means of holding power over another. This abuse may be overt or covert, constant, controlling, and what Bach and Deutsch (1980) call "crazymaking.

To a narrative therapist, there are few interactions between couples that are not influenced by patriarchy. If there is an abuse of power in a relationship, a narrative therapist would view the responsibility for the abuse of power as lying in the hands of the person abusing the power. A narrative approach would invite the abuser to Recognize the abuse as abuse. Position himself against it. Accept total responsibility for stopping it.

The abuser's worth is derived from a sense of one-upmanship and winning over. If the partner accomplishes something, the abuser views her accomplishment

The abuser controls the interpersonal communication and, therefore, the interpersonal reality by refusing to discuss upsetting interactions. The abuser blames the partner for upsetting interactions, and the partner believes him and therefore thinks that they are her fault.

In some cases, the partner of an abuser may eventually come to the conclusion that something is wrong in the relationship but not know what it is. This is most common if the abuser is covert. The abuser may quietly counter nearly every comment and enthusiasm the partner expresses.

You get conditioned to it and confused by it, and then you don't know what's going on.