Quotes About Jay Leno

The Flinstones wore furs, they ate red meat, and had a stoneage philosophy. In fact, they were the first Republicans.

My first acting gig was a skit for Jay Leno on 'The Tonight Show.' It was this Barbie commercial where I got to pour mud all over Barbie dolls and watch the heads pop off. It was so exciting, a lot of fun.

A top geneticist at Stanford says human intelligence is declining. You know what that means? We are seeing Congress at its smartest and most effective right now.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

The only reason I'm ever in character as 'Larry The Cable Guy' is because that's what I'm hired to do. In my movies, obviously they hired 'Larry The Cable Guy' to be 'Larry The Cable Guy.' When I do my shows, I'm 'Larry The Cable Guy.' When I do Jay Leno, it's: 'Please welcome 'Larry The Cable Guy.'

NBC's priorities are Jimmy Fallon and Jay Leno, and then there's me.

I've performed on 'The Tonight Show' with both Johnny Carson and Jay Leno, but not at the same time.

Stephen Colbert has such a loyal following; I don't know if it's the same with Jay Leno; he really inspires love in people, and there can be a lucky ricochet of that for some people.

I've always wanted to do a segment on a talk show. Jay Leno has been such a good friend, and if he would allow me, I'd have to get it all together, but I'd like to go on 'The Tonight Show' and do a set with no props. Or come out with a trunk and never touch it. Or come out with a clear trunk with nothing in it.

BP CEO Tony Hayward said he would just like to get his life back. He wants to get his life back. You know, I say give him life plus 20.

Jay Leno is not a guy who likes change. He eats the same food every day.

I am a big car enthusiast. I totally understand guys like Jay Leno who have a thousand cars. But asking me my favorite car would be like asking my favorite song or favorite food - it changes everyday.

I first started doing hidden-camera segments on 'The Tonight Show With Jay Leno.' He was the coolest guy in the world to work for because he understands the creative process, and he had total trust. And he just let me make up whatever I wanted; I experimented and tried and played. We had a lot of fun over there.

I did standup comedy. I opened once for Jay Leno.

Stephen Hawking is getting a divorce. That's scary. If the smartest guy in the world can't figure out women, we're screwed.

Howard Dean is a politician, a medical doctor and a Democrat. So he has three reasons to tell women to take off their clothes now.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

Leno said the rainy weather in California couldn't have come at a worse possible time. Today was the day NBC was supposed to burn down the studio for the insurance money. Jan. 21, 2010

Americans who read the papers or watch Jay Leno have been aware for some time now that there is a slim but real possibility - about 1 in 45,000 - that an 850-foot-long asteroid called Apophis could strike Earth with catastrophic consequences on April 13, 2036.

Jay Leno is not a guy who likes change. He eats the same food every day.

President Clinton, this guy is sharp. Boy, he gave Hillary the most romantic Valentine's gift today, a huge rose garden. Where would he get that?