Quotes About Conflict

If, however, you would like to see the behavior change, it is more effective not to attack the person outright but to focus hard on the problematic behavior.

If you open a door, however, as Diane Nash did with her persistent questions, you offer the other a way out and all your power can be deployed in persuading them to take it. In short, rather than working to frustrate the other, focus on redirecting their attention to a positive outcome.

Framing your solution negatively, such as "Don't shout at me," tends to focus the other's attention even more on the unwanted behavior and may unconsciously reinforce it, particularly if you are shouting back at them. It is more effective to say, quietly, "Please talk to me in a quiet tone." Focus the other's mind clearly on the positive action you want them to take.

3A trap": we attack, we accommodate (in other words, give in), or we avoid altogether

Procurar culpados faz com que as pessoas se embaralhem com o problema.

Discutir com base em posições ameaça o relacionamento.

You need confidence to stand up for yourself in the face of the other's reaction. You need power to be able to follow through on your No if the other refuses to respect it.

If the other refuses to respect your No, you may see only two choices: submission and outright war. Yet there is a third choice, highlighted by Gandhi: to underscore your Positive No. Don't overreact, underscore. To underscore means to emphasize patiently and persistently that No in fact means No. It means continuing to stand up for what is important to you without destroying the possibility of a deal or a healthy relationship.

The less dependent we feel on others to satisfy our needs for happiness, the more mature and truly satisfying our relationships with others are likely to be. The less needy we feel, the less conflict there will be and the easier it will be for us to get to Yes in challenging situations.

measure, he put some slugs into a couple men rushing forward, tugging at their guns. They spun as they were hit, crying out and falling

It is not love, or morality, or international law that determines the outcome of world affairs, but the changing distribution of organized force

No victory, no conquest justified a single death, a man starved, frozen, lacerated, a single orphaned child. All war wanted was itself.

as I sat there on the limb looking at the old fellow he cried again something came over me I dint want to kill him I hollered down at Rubin I don't kill want to kill the ghost coon.

A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him.

You were given the choice between war and dishonour. You chose dishonour, and you will have war.' - To Neville Chamberlain

When you have to kill a man it costs nothing to be polite.

There is only one thing worse than fighting with allies, and that is fighting without them

I decline utterly to be impartial between the fire brigade and the fire.

If this long island story of ours is to end at last, let it end only when each one of us lies choking in his own blood upon the ground.

It is my purpose, as one who lived and acted in these days, first to show how easily the tragedy of the Second World War could have been prevented; how the malice of the wicked was reinforced by the weakness of the virtuous...

If we don't end war, war will end us.

They have destroyed your weapons," he had told the generals, in effect. "But these weapons would in any case have become obsolete before the next war. That war will be fought with brand-new ones, and the army which is least hampered with obsolete material will have a great advantage.

War will find us whether we are ready or not.

Un prigioniero di guerra è un uomo che cerca di ucciderti, non ci riesce, dopo di che ti chiede di non ucciderlo.