Quotes About Absurdity

Hey. Sometimes life is a shit flavored Popsicle.

We may not care to play the part of public jesters ourselves, but the least we can do is to be grateful to those who are willing to become absurd for our benefit. Patronize them daintily, therefore, lest they backslide into propriety.

The first thing I noticed when I woke up was the hippo squatting on my head.

Great. Dead bodies, road kill and Toys R Us. Could this day get any better?

If I had bodily functions, I think I would have peed my pants.

You have made me more frustrated than a zombie at a salad bar. Fix it!

A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders zero beers. Orders 999,999,999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders negative one beer. Orders a 'sfdeljknesv.

the fantastic power and ultimate absurdity of unchecked exponential growth.

If this is philosophy it is at any rate a philosophy that is not in its right mind.

Tragicomic absurdity from Disney World, as the pack of Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Mulan fell upon children, each red bite a boutonniere.

I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it.

Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?

And, of course, the funniest food of all, kumquats.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Nobody ever died of being shot by a cookie

You destroyed five million dollars' worth of luxury cars. Yes, but none of them are wearing human heads as hood ornaments.

For if the question is absurd in itself and demands unnecessary answers, then, besides the embarrassment of the one who proposes it, it also has the disadvantage of misleading the incautious listener into absurd answers, and presenting the ridiculous sight (as the ancients said) of one person milking a billy-goat while the other holds a sieve underneath. (A58/B82)

It was a voyage into the absurd.

I am the nonsense priest of the nonsense god!

This is a bit like being accused of shagging the sister ah don't have.

She was good at playing abstract confusion in the same way that a midget is good at being short.

When you look on one of your contemporary 'good copies' of historical remains, ask yourself the question: Not what style, but in what civilization is this building? And the absurdity, vulgarity, anachronism and solecism of the modern structure will be revealed to you in a most startling fashion.

The absurd man is he who never changes.