Quotes About George Burns

Happiness is a dry martini and a good woman ... or a bad woman.

I'm more likely to quote the golfer George Burns than the legendary late comedian by the same name who lived to be 100.

People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them: a paternity suit.

When I was in Vegas women were throwing their hotel keys at me. But it was after they checked out.

There's been periods of broadcasts in the past where you could see all ages of entertainers, ranging from George Burns to Shirley Temple. That's not the condition now.

George Burns was a Vaudeville performer I particularly loved.

George Burns was a Vaudeville performer I particularly loved.