Quotes About Aging

I lost some weight, grew my hair and now every woman in America over 40 wants to date me. It's their daughters I want to convince.

The robe of flesh wears thin, and with the years God shines through all things.

If God had to give a woman wrinkles, He might at least have put them on the soles of her feet.

God made the human body like a machine with built-in obsolescence.

There are moments when I can't believe I'm as old as I am. But I feel better physically than I did 10 years ago. I don't think, Oh God, I'm missing something.

I always say God should have given women one extra decade at least, especially if you want a family. You're trying to pack a lot in.

My eyesight's gone, my reflexes are shot, and I can't stay awake, but thank God I can still drive.

God, middle age is an unending insult.

Balding if God's way of showing you are only human... He takes the hair off your head and puts it in your ears.

Oh, my God, my thirties blew! Forties are great.

I think things are going to go right for me again. I'm not old. I'm old enough, but I photograph young, thank God, and I still have a public. I still get fan mail.

You know your getting older when you lay in bed til 10am and think to yourself god I just wasted half the day.

You get older and you see yourself and say, 'God, he's old, who's that?'

I believe we will start believing in God as we get closer to death.

Nor bird nor beast Could make me wish for anything this day, Being old, but that the old alone might die, And that would be against God's Providence.

All my references are 50 years old-when somebody shot J.R., you know? Oh my god, I'm 100!

I think I'm past any window where I'm suddenly going to become surprisingly ripped so that people go, 'Oh, my God, what happened to you?'

Aging is God's idea. It's one of the ways he keeps us headed homeward.

I felt like I was hobbling, like one oof the old crones from Act I of Macbeth - God knows my hair felt scraggy enough that I must have looked the part.

I look at my hands and go, 'Hmm...what happened? Whose hands are those? Oh my God, they're mine'

But, dear God, don't listen to me. I'm an old lady in the middle of nowhere without a real toilet.

The first indication of menopause is a broken thermostat. It's either that or your weight. In any case, if you don't do something, you could be dead by August. God, middle age is an unending insult.

I was very frightened when I turned forty. I suddenly thought I ought to wake up and be speaking with the voice of God.

gray hair is gods graffiti