Quotes About Mortician

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

It seems that 'rocket scientist' is a job category that's here for the long haul, like 'mortician.' But all this activity masks an important point: rockets are not a terribly efficient way to lift things into space.

It smelled something like a keg of bad beer overturned in a mortician's storage room on a hot summer's day.

It smelled something like a keg of bad beer overturned in a mortician's storage room on a hot summer day.

Did you really shoot all those badmen in Arizona?" the banker asked, early on. "My share," Wyatt admitted. "What was bad about them?" the mortician asked. "We were Republicans," Wyatt said. "They were Democrats." And that, in this group, had been enough.

dentist is only half the doctor he claims to be. That he's also half mortician is the secret he keeps to himself. The ailing bits he tries to turn healthy again. The dead bits he just tries to make presentable. He bores a hole, clears the rot, fills the pit, and seals the hatch. He yanks the teeth, pours the mold, fits the fakes, and paints to match. Open cavities are the eye stones of skulls, and lone molars stand erect as tombstones.

Charlie Ledley was even worse: He had the pallor of a mortician and the manner of a man bent on putting off, for as long as possible, definite action.

'Graveminder' is about a mortician, a young woman with commitment issues, a dead teenager, and a town called Claysville where the dead don't always stay dead.

I tell Marla about the woman in Dear Abby who married a handsome successful mortician and on their wedding night, he made her soak in a tub of ice water until her skin was freezing to the touch, and then he made her lie in bed completely still while he had intercourse with her cold inert body. The funny thing is this woman had done this as a newlywed, and gone on to do it for the next ten years of marriage and now she was writing to Dear Abby to ask if Abby thought it meant something.

There's been an accident. I had Mr. Loosey on the table, and I was gonna get him dressed, and then I had to go fix the thermostat, and when I got back to Mr. Loosey, I noticed he was missing his..um, private part. I don't know how this could happen. One minute it was there, and the next minute it was gone. -Louie Moon, mortician's assistant

Get him in leg irons and transport him to the hospital," Grier told him curtly. "I need a doctor," Clark raged. "I'm shot. My hand's bleeding!" Grier stared at him. "If you make a move I don't like, you'll need a mortician," he said with pure malice, and abruptly spun the Colt with a professional skill that made Clark back up a step.