Quotes About Caregiving

My dad, who was seventy-four, was now ill with myeloma and cancer in his bloodstream. My mom, who was much younger, spent every day and night taking care of him. I wanted somebody in my life to do that for me, and I wanted somebody I could do that for.

I sit by the bed with an aching back, and start to cry as I pick up the notebook. I am tired now, so I sit, alone and apart from my wife. And when the nurses come in they see two people they must comfort. A woman shaking in fear and the old man who loves her more deeply than life itself crying softly in the corner, his face in his hands.

My mother had multiple sclerosis.

I used to babysit a lot, and I used to be a nanny.

With my babies, if I wanted to go pick them up I would just go in the room in the middle of the night, but Nicky is very much on a schedule. This is nap time, this is tummy time, so I'm just kind of like, 'Okay.'

My husband had dementia," she told me softly. "I took care of him for six years with these two hands. For a few months the insurance gave me help. Certain medications they pay after six years. They told me once he couldn't swallow no more there was nothing we could do. . . . He died at home last year.

When you're working with dementia patients, life is hard for both of you, but at least you don't have to keep coming up with new repartee. And I really don't say that to make light of the situation. I say it to find light in the situation, which I honestly think is a favor to all involved.

Living with an addict is a 24/7 business. It's a bit like having a baby. You're joined at the hip, and every five minutes you're hit with that paranoia: where is he? What's he doing? What's he up to? If he was going somewhere, we made him call us as soon as he arrived; if a journey was supposed to take ten minutes, and he took twenty, we'd be going: why are you late?

I played a lot of roles in my mother's life. I was her driver when she wanted to go to places, her cook when she was unwell, but one role that remained unchanged is that of a friend.

I don't think you can underestimate how much carers need some support.

I think I couldn't balance my marriage and my mother's deteriorating health. I realized it was unfair to my husband to have my divided attention. I understood he deserved better and should go for that. He deserved the attention of a partner, not another headache, and I didn't want to share my time with anyone else but my mother.

No matter who you are, what you've accomplished, what your financial situation is - when you're dealing with a parent with Alzheimer's, you yourself feel helpless. The parent can't work, can't live alone, and is totally dependent, like a toddler. As the disease unfolds, you don't know what to expect.

Of course I don't think any of the past will go away. The thing is, with me and Stephen, for many years, I put every spoon of food into his mouth, dressed him, and bathed him. You do not forget that experience.

If you're the person living closest to the parent who's going to need help, and you take on the whole role of primary caregiver, you can be pretty sure your sibling who lives farthest away is going to call you and say, 'You don't know what you're doing.' Because they're not on the spot, and they probably feel guilty.

You can be as devoted and loving a spouse or a caregiver or child, but you also have to remember that you have to program time for yourself in there, because it will renew you.

Flexible working is not just for women with children. It is necessary at the other end of the scale. If people can move into part-time work, instead of retirement, then that will be a huge help. If people can fit their work around caring responsibilities for the elderly, the disabled, then again that's very positive.

I've come to realize that being around someone with Alzheimer's is like being around someone who's really, really wasted. And like someone who's had way too much too drink, his mood and attention swings from one subject and emotion to another. Now he pauses, spots something

I lost my son in late 2011. He had been totally incapacitated from his neck down for the last eight years of his life, but his mind was alive and brilliant in those years. He even wrote a book, 'Allegheny Mountain,' lying at home in his hospital bed.

I used to work with mentally disabled people when I was 18 or 19, changing diapers and catheters. I was working, like, 16 hour night shifts, having to distribute meds and go capture people who would break out of the house. Sometimes they'd have seizures, and we'd have to rush them to the hospital. That was an interesting time, very humbling.

If you begin to think you are solely responsible for keeping your loved one alive and safe, you will eventually find yourself playing God. This phase can develop into an unhealthy, codependent relationship.

I think women are natural caretakers. They take care of everybody. They take care of their husbands and their kids and their dogs, and don't spend a lot of time just getting back and taking time out.

The fact that women are the primary care-givers is a problem for women and men

We have women entering lower-paying career fields. Women are still, culturally, the primary caregivers for children, even though we would love to have fathers and mothers share responsibility.

I know several women my age who are really poor...because they spent most of their energy taking care of children.