Quotes from Jim C. Hines

Integration my undead ass. Did they teach you about the Great American Melting Pot in grade school?" she asked. "Some of us don't like the idea of being melted down and blended into stew for the rest of you to devour.

However, the recent decision to allow the humans of Earth to govern themselves is the most tentacle-knotting foolishness to come out of the Alliance Judicial Council in decades.

You believe in aliens?" "I'm dating a dryad, and you pulled a snake out of your phone. You're going to draw the line at aliens?" "If you try to tell me aliens built the pyramids, I am so out of here." "Don't be ridiculous." I waited a beat, then added, "The pyramids were built by mummified elves.

It was an elegant trap, one which had claimed the sanity of many libriomancers over the years. As you exhausted yourself physically and mentally, your judgment eroded as well, leading you to make mistakes when you could least afford them. Sleep was the best cure. Naturally, insomnia was a common side effect of magic use.

Sure, Death was going to find him sooner or later, but it seemed as though Death were taking the scenic route to get there.

I slammed the book shut and and crowed, 'And that is why you don't kick the librarian off the investigation!

Among other things, hobgoblins liked to use nasty traps and ambushes. When they caught a goblin alone in their territory, they had been known to torture it for hours, then send the crippled wretch back to the goblins as a warning. True, goblins did the same thing if they managed to catch a hobgoblin, but that was simple justice.

bookstores, libraries … they're the closest thing I have to a church.

Practically speaking, it was like carrying a Labrador retriever over a tightrope and having a squirrel race past.

Most Krakau massed less than the average human. They were roughly tube-shaped, with nine tentacles—arms—limbs?

I'm a libriomancer. Mind tricks don't work on me. Only money." When all else fails, fall back on movie quotes.

Besides, is it really stealing if you're stealing from an asshole?" "I'd have to double-check, but I don't think the criminal code includes an asshole clause.

It's amazing how quickly you start following the rules when someone sticks a cranial explosive to the base of your skull.

He found it peculiar the way these adventurers thought anything they found was "rightfully" theirs. Why couldn't they come out and admit they were stealing from the monsters?

Something weird wants to kill us? Cool! Where did it come from, and how does it work?

Story was magic. Magic was story. Memory was also story, disparate events linked together in our mind to create a narrative.

There is no right choice. You chose. Your job now is to make the most of that choice.

The biggest liar in the world is They Say,'" I muttered. "Douglas Malloch.

The true enemy of good isn't evil, but fear. Evil will battle good, but fear will corrupt it.

A minimum of three and a half hours. Probably closer to five." The vent's valve mechanism was meant to be serviced from the other side. It took half an hour of fighting to find a decent angle with the wrench and remove the bolts. She finally managed to tug it loose, at which point she had to spend another twenty minutes using her torch to cut the damned thing into smaller pieces so she could get it out of her way.

If you really want to kill a libriomancer, hook a bomb up to a big red button and tell him not to press it.

Stop derailing my plans with logic and reason,

Surface-dwellers had an expression about the wrath of the gods. Since goblins didn't really care for gods, they had an alternate expression-they called it the wrath of the chef.

Heart of Glass