Quotes from Helene Lerner

When you leave your ego at the door and stop trying to be the smartest person in the room, your opinions and ideas will be more appropriately valued and appreciated" (and that's applicable to both genders). He told me that to be heard, women should offer insights regularly rather than only expressing the occasional opinion.

Confidence spark Try this the next time you receive feedback and find yourself getting defensive. Take a few deep breaths and repeat back what has been said to show that you have understood. Doing this will give you a little distance from reacting in a way you might regret. Later on you can reflect on what fits and what doesn't. If you need support, get input from a trusted colleague.

Should I work on it or let it go?" Debbie also encourages her supervisors to talk candidly about areas she needs to develop. She asks for feedback directly if it is not being given. She tells them, "It's nice to know that there are good things that I'm doing, but that doesn't help me improve. Please share with me something that will give me an opportunity to grow.

But what if instead of trying to be nice, we respond authentically? What would that look like? For one, people would know where we really stand on the issues that are important to us. In addition, we would have more time to focus on making a difference and advancing our careers instead of trying to please other people.

He helped me get a coach, and I started to handle the issues that stopped me from advancing. I was raised to be 'nice' and not to brag, to play down my abilities.

Confidence spark Take inventory of your strengths—actually make a list of them. Call to mind your current supervisor and previous managers—what else would they say about your strengths? Take this all in.

Confidence is about stepping up over and over again, looking fear in the face and moving ahead anyway.