Quotes from Sean Evans

I want to retire in Chicago.

I never feel more famous than at the hot sauce expo.

You can only be about that Chrysler Town & Country life if you are absolutely compatible with your partner.

Heartbreak can be so pathetic.

I always had dreams that I could be on television. I used to watch 'The Late Show' with my dad, and I'd make him pause the VHS whenever the audience laughed to explain jokes to me. But it's hard to just 'get into TV.'

I'm not Ryan Seacrest. If I want people to pay attention to me, I have to just eat scorching-hot food.

Penny Hardaway has a decided style advantage over other players because he rocked one of the crispiest jerseys in NBA history.

Everybody always wants to make the show 'What's it like to have a beer with that person?' And everyone sucks at making it.

I want 'Hot Ones' to give people that warm, fuzzy, TGIF 'Family Matters' Christmas-episode feeling after they watch it.

If ever there were a case for raising taxes on the wealthy, it's Andrew Bynum.

Fraternities are bizarre because, as a pledge, some clown who wears Hollister & Co. flip-flops exclusively will make you clean his toilet with a toothbrush.

It's weird, but I'm so empathetic; when I see people dying on hot sauce, I do feel for them. And I'm a Midwestern guy, so I think I'm just naturally nice and polite.

In an age of political correctness, even the most apparent gender assertions are dismissed as ignorance.

When you decorate with neon beer lights, it's hard to create a class divide. So, the dive bar is an institution that welcomes every kind of person.

Prodigal sons like Barack Obama, Kanye West, and Michael Jordan only come back to Chicago to sell their homes.

It's amazing how quickly a defined jawline can turn your luck around.

Patrons, don't berate bouncers for denying you entry.

Preparing America's student loan crippled grads to enter a hopeless and crowded job market is no easy task, which is why we should show more love to our nation's professors.

It's amazing how one introductory course in environmental science can turn a 20-year-old into an Biofuels expert.

Bobby Petrino slinks through coaching jobs with the stench and trustworthiness of expired mayonnaise.

If your Facebook page has turned into a shrine to your relationship, pet, or newborn, no one will say anything, but all who are subjected to your news feed are totally annoyed. Super fans who turn their profiles into mausoleums dedicated to their teams are equally insufferable and one hundred times more pathetic.

When Complex hired me, originally I wasn't at First We Feast, I was just like a hired hand for Complex. They'd send me out to different events or they'd have people visiting the office and I'd do interviews with athletes, musicians, whoever.

Hot Ones' is a show that takes a celebrity, which by definition is a person whose lifestyle is unattainable, and then 'Hot Ones' takes that celebrity and knocks them down a peg - a level that everyone can relate to.

I never really see entertainment as a noble pursuit necessarily, but people really want a sense of normalcy, even if it's being delivered to them in a 'Hot Ones' episode.