Quotes from Will Ferrell

A lot of people have gotten into comedy because of certain influences in their lives or events that were painful, and I really have wracked my brain to figure it out. I pretty much have had a normal childhood. Maybe it was too normal.

I did plenty of jobs that I hated. I was a bank teller and terrible at it. I parked cars, a valet. I answered phones. I somehow avoided being a waiter. I knew I wouldn't be able to keep the order straight. I'm not much of a multi-tasker.

In the fourth grade, I learned how to fake walking into a door. You know, you hit it with your hand and snap your head back. The girls loved it.

I'm a Cancer; I'm music-passionate. I like long walks on the beach.

One of my first memories of being a kid was, 'I want to have a real job when I grow up.' And to me that meant you wear a suit and a hat and carry a briefcase and go to your job.

I guess ultimately a lot of comedians just wanna be taken seriously.

I've always wanted to sail around the world in a handmade boat, and I built a boat.

My kind of wanting to be funny didn't come from need, necessarily. The closest I can analyze it is that it was an easy way to make friends, I found out. It was just a great kind of social tool.

For people who have done comedy after a certain point in time, I think there's a base level of, 'O.K., I think I'm decently funny.' But unless you just have some massive ego, I really think you're still fighting against that.

Often times I'm confronted with a quote that I don't remember saying. So, on one hand it's very flattering, it is just so surreal.

It'd be great to be in a position where you can make choices regardless of money. My tastes are always gonna lead me to go for the amazing project where I'm being paid in Turkish cantaloupes.

Though I know consciousness kind of boxes you in, it still encompasses the artists that I knew were conscious throughout history of music - they're the ones that you look at as the legends.

Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac.

I know the nature of comedy, and you never know what will happen with the next movie or whether people will find it funny.

I have only been funny about seventy four per cent of the time. Yes I think that is right. Seventy-four per cent of the time.

America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bad ass speed.

You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It's great to be here.

When you're doing an out-and-out comedy, the notion of preparing for a character - I hope I don't reveal too much of myself here - but, uh, no, I'm not doing anything.

I've always loved watching the news on TV. As a kid, I loved watching Walter Cronkite, for some reason.

I've never been a conceited person or cocky, never felt boastful, but I always had a sense of self-worth; I always had a real sense of myself.

When you hear that you're going to be working with a first-time director, sometimes that can be a concern to people.

In junior high P.E., I was way too shy to take a shower in front of the other kids. It was a horribly awkward time - body hair, odors... So I'd go from my sweaty shirt back into my regular clothes and have to continue the day.

I might be more fluent in Swedish than I am in Spanish. My wife speaks it to our kids, and they're fluent so I hear it all the time, so I've got that under my belt.

When I was a kid, 'Land of the Lost' was my favorite show, just because it was - in the landscape of Saturday morning cartoons - it was so unique. It was a live-action show and kids were in it, these creatures, these Sleestaks and dinosaurs. Every week was a different adventure. I couldn't wait. I loved it so much.