Quotes from Iliza Shlesinger

Standup is a tough job and a gritty job.

We're so hard on ourselves, and there's a freedom in realizing that we're our toughest critics.

I have the comedic chops and intelligence to raise points and discuss both sides of whatever is on our mind as a society.

There was a sketch group at Emerson, and if you could believe it, we were the cool kids. That's how Emerson rolls. I was a film major, but I spent most of my time doing that.

I was a big fan of sketch comedy and cartoons growing up.

I don't know what it's like to be mocked because of your skin color. I don't know what it's like to feel overweight. All I can do as a woman is have compassion, treat other women with kindness, and allow them to just be happy and not judge them for it.

I believe in always having a lot of irons in the fire.

Getting on stage and screaming at all Republicans does nothing more than isolate people.

Whether it be the gym or telling a guy to stop mistreating me or getting through school with a C+ average but making people think I'm much smarter... it's all about strength and how you wear it.

The more comprehensive your language is, the more likely people are to believe everything you're saying. It really just comes from the power of knowing you're the smartest person in the room, and if you aren't, you're definitely going to sound like it.

I think a big part of feminism - and this is something I'm sure a bunch of women will take my head off for - but a big part of feminism is women allowing other women to just be the kind of women that they are.

When I started my career, I started with black comics: Bruce Bruce, Mark Curry, Bill Bellamy. It takes all kinds of influences.

It's only through aging and going through heartbreak and loss and successes and failures that you can look back and look at the mistakes some young people make.

I've built a career on evenly entertaining men and women. And I'm kind of known for not making either side feel bad.

Getting to prove yourself in a room that's not your typical demo is an experience every comic should try. It makes you better.

It said, 'War Is Not the Answer.' I disagree. I think war absolutely is the answer. And if you don't agree with me, happy Fourth of July.

To be labeled pathetic because you enjoy the company of a loving creature who is always down to hang out, sleep, and eat with you is unfair.

Unfortunately, we don't live in a society where you can say whatever you want, and there will be no repercussions. Pick and choose your battles. I think that's the key.

My mother always told me that you should have one room in your house where you celebrate all of your achievements. You shouldn't have them spread throughout.

Always be nice to the front desk staff because they can choose to make your life a living hell, and they'll remember you.

I'm always looking for bigger audiences and bigger stages. Really, however I can reach my fans is what will make me happy - well, I'll actually probably never be happy.

I think that it's an easy thing to say, that whenever women do stand up, that 'Oh, they must hate men' - and I'm like, 'Well, if you listen carefully, it's actually a lovely tutorial that I wouldn't give to men unless I cared.'

I got a job as a coat check girl at a nightclub - this was in my first few months of being in L.A.

I'm going to die unhappy. That's how artists roll!