Quotes from Iyanla Vanzant

Acceptance means that you know, regardless of what happened, that there is something bigger than you at work. It also means you know that you are okay and that you will continue to be okay.

God is love. Love is always present, surrounding us; guiding, growing, and teaching us. Even in the midst of total chaos, pain, and dysfunction, love is calling us to a higher experience and expression.

Unworthiness always puts you in debt to anyone and everyone who shows you the slightest degree of attention or love or energy. Eventually, in this form of bankrupt relationship, your benefactors will demand or expect more than you are able or willing to give. This is the precise moment they will choose to call in the loan.

I've learned we all get exactly what we need, when we need it, in order to learn what God intends for us to know so we can be who God intends for us to be.

When a thing has served its purpose, it will go away. If you try to hold on to something that has already fulfilled its purpose in your life, you are going to hurt yourself. If holding on is disturbing your peace of mind, it makes sense to let go. Surrender all attachments to people and things that you have been struggling to hold on to.

If you are a woman, you may need to forgive those whom you have loved or those who refused to love you; those who have hurt you, shamed you, and abandoned you; or those who left you scarred or wounded.

When your life is going downhill, it doesn't get better just because you want it to. Nor can you will it to be better. Your life will only get better when you get better.

Even though there is a part of me holding on to the belief that I am now, have always been, and will always be unworthy, I am still willing to love and accept myself.

From speaking with my mother I learned that forgiveness is a process that begins with the choice to end your own suffering.

As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison. —NELSON MANDELA

Very often we claim to know something. We get an idea about what to do or not do, yet, for some reason our behavior doesn't change. At times, we just can't seem to do what we know. This is known as mental healing. Something has shifted in your thinking, but it has not reach the other levels of your being—the heart and the spirit.

A change of perspective may be all it takes to transform a painful experience into a powerful growth experience.

I now know that nothing in my life will change until I change the way I see my life and myself.

Whether or not we know what we are creating or how we are creating it, when things do not turn out the way we desire, our human instincts drive us to look for someone to blame.

More often than not, the things we detest and judge in others are a reflection of the things we cannot accept about ourselves.

Today I am devoted to addressing all the little things about me and in my life that I have not mastered!

What we eventually uncovered was that I was afraid—afraid to ask for what I wanted, afraid to speak up for myself, afraid that I didn't have what it took to do what I really wanted to do. In response to my fears, I blamed other people for what I considered their failure to acknowledge me. The conversation didn't stop there.

Feelings come and they pass. Whatever we are feeling in any given moment is just a passing experience. Our work is to learn to accept what we feel and to learn to let it pass.

It doesn't matter what road you take, hill you climb, or path you're on, you will always end up in the same place, learning. — Ralph Stevenson

You simply cannot pay the debts that come along with believing you are unworthy.

Forgiveness is not an easy chore to undertake, nor is it for the weak. I forgive you, God, for leaving me out here to figure out all of this on my own. Yet forgiveness is the daily minimum requirement for a healthy, fulfilling, and meaningful life. I forgive my mind for believing that what was is what always has to be.

I have a body, but I am not my body. I have a face, but I am not my face.

HAD I NOT SPENT SO MUCH TIME DOING SOMETHING THAT MADE ME SO MISERABLE, I WOULD HAVE NEVER LEARNED HOW TO APPRECIATE DOING WHAT BRINGS ME JOY.  

Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable. — Maya Angelou