Quotes from Gretchen Rubin

Delivery can sometimes make a big difference in whether others see a Questioner as constructive or obstructive.

I didn't want to slow down, but rather to change the experience of the pace of my life...

It's a Secret of Adulthood: The biggest waste of time is to do well something that we need not do at all.

We all know the secret of dieting—eat better, eat less, exercise more—it's the application that's challenging. I had to create a scheme to put happiness ideas into practice in my life.

I concluded that the real key to habits is decision making—or, more accurately, the lack of decision making. …A habit requires no decision from me, because I've already decided. …This freedom from decision making is crucial, because when I have to decide—which often involves resisting temptation or postponing gratification—I tax my self-control.

One regrets the loss even of one's worst habits. Perhaps one regrets them the most. They are such an essential part of one's personality. —OSCAR WILDE

It's true that novelty and challenge bring happiness...but routine can also bring happiness. The pleasure of doing the same thing in the same way every day...take[s] on a certain beauty and provide[s] a kind of invisible architecture...

When scheduling a new habit, it helps to tie it to an existing habit, such as "after breakfast," or to an external cue, such as "when my alarm rings

Arranging to Fail Loophole:

They're perceived to be more friendly, warmer, and even more physically attractive. A study showed that students who were happy as college freshmen were earning more money in their midthirties—without any wealth advantage to start. Being happy can make a big difference in your work life.

anticipation of happiness is sometimes greater than the happiness actually experienced. All the more reason to revel in anticipation.

Whenever I start a new book, I think, "This is the most interesting subject of all time. It's sad, I'll never enjoy writing another book as much as I enjoy this one." Every time, I'm convinced. And then I change my mind when I start the next book.

Although people often assume that cravings intensify over time, research shows that with active distraction, urges—even strong urges—usually subside within about fifteen minutes. Drawing on intrinsic motivation makes us far more likely to stick to a behavior, and to find it satisfying.

This was exactly what I had noticed about the "stopping" aspect of First Steps. When we try a new habit for the first time, it feels full of promise, even if it's arduous. But most of that excitement is gone the second time, and the habit's drawbacks are more apparent. Plus, there's the discouraging feeling of having lost ground, of going backwards.

Surprisingly, stress doesn't necessarily make us likely to indulge in bad habits; when we're anxious or tired, we fall back on our habits, whether bad or good.

Enthusiasm is more important to mastery than innate ability, it turns out, because the single most important element in developing an expertise is your willingness to practice. Therefore

Accomplish more by working less.

Studies show that if you have five or more friends with whom to discuss an important matter, you're far more likely to describe yourself as "very happy.

Your lack of planning is not my emergency.")

Outer order contributes to inner calm." Why is this true? Perhaps it's the tangible sense of control, or the relief from visual noise, or the release from guilt. In the span of a happy life, having a messy desk or an overflowing closet is clearly trivial, and yet creating order gives a disproportionate boost of energy and cheer.

The second reason rewards pose a danger for habits is that they require a decision. A habit, by my definition, is something we do without decision making.

Sprinters are pleased with their work product, because sprinting is how they do their best work. Procrastinators aren't pleased with their work product; they know they could've done a better job if they'd allowed themselves more time.

True, money can't buy happiness. But spent wisely, it can buy things that contribute mightily to a happy life.

For instance, if it's 9 a.m. and I have an appointment at 11 a.m., I'll think 'Oh, I have to go somewhere in two hours, so I can't really start anything serious' and then end up wasting my whole morning waiting for one thing to happen.