Quotes from Gretchen Rubin

Forbearance is a form of generosity.

It's been freeing to focus on what works for me rather than what's wrong with me.

There are times in the lives of most of us," observed William Edward Hartpole Lecky, "when we would have given all the world to be as we were but yesterday, though that yesterday had passed over us unappreciated and unenjoyed.

Keep it simple' wasn't always the right response. Many things that boosted my happiness also added complexity to my life. Having children. Learning to post videos to my website. Going to an out-of-town wedding. Applied too broadly, my impulse to 'Keep it simple' would impoverish me. 'Life is barren enough surely with all her trappings,' warned Samuel Johnson, 'let us therefore by cautious how we strip her.

When I focus on the way men or husbands generally behave, I start to lump Jamie along with half of humanity. I find myself feeling angry or annoyed with Jamie for things he hasn't even done.

I always had the uncomfortable feeling that if I wasn't sitting in front of a computer typing, I was wasting my time--but I pushed myself to take a wider view of what was productive. Time spend with my family and friends was never wasted.

Experts say that denying bad feelings intensifies them, acknowledging bad feelings allows good feelings to return.

One of the biggest wastes of time is doing something well that didn't need to be done at all.

When deciding what to buy, remember that some things are easy to buy—but then we have to use them. If they're not used, they don't enhance our lives; they just contribute to guilt and clutter.

I often learn more from one person's highly idiosyncratic experiences than I do from sources that detail universal practices or cite up-to-date studies.

When Churchill was running for office for the first time, he went door to door to ask for votes. He knocked on the door of an irritable man who, when Churchill introduced himself, said, "Vote for you? Why, I'd rather vote for the devil!" "I understand," answered Churchill. "But in case your friend is not running, may I count on your support?

We are happy when we are growing.

Just because we're busy doesn't mean we're being productive. Working is one of the most dangerous forms of procrastination.

By mindfully choosing our habits, we harness the power of mindlessness as a sweeping force for serenity, energy, and growth.

arriving rarely makes you as happy as you anticipate. p 84

What I do most days matters more than what I do once in a while." That kind of self-encouragement is a greater safeguard than self-blame.

A willingness to be pleased requires modesty and even innocence--easy to deride as mawkish and sentimental.

Finally I am coming to the conclusion that my highest ambition is to be what I already am. —Journal of Thomas Merton

This is one of the many paradoxes of happiness: we seek to control our lives, but the unfamiliar and the unexpected are important sources of happiness.

If we want something to count in our lives, we should figure out a way to count it.

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld advised aspiring comedian Brad Isaac that, because daily writing was the key to writing better jokes, Isaac should buy a calendar with a box for every day of the year, and every day, after writing, cross off the day with a big red X. "After a few days you'll have a chain," Seinfeld explained. "You'll like seeing that chain, especially when you get a few weeks under your belt. Your only job next is to not break the chain.

When scheduling a new habit, it helps to tie it to an existing habit, such as "after breakfast," or to an external cue, such as "when my alarm rings," because without such a trigger, it's easy to forget to do the new action.

When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.

Contemporary research shows that happy people are more altruistic, more productive, more helpful, more likable, more creative, more resilient, more interested in others, friendlier, and healthier. Happy people make better friends, colleagues, and citizens.