Quotes from Seth Grahame-Smith

bottom half of the page had descended into a doodle of a tiny man giving the middle finger to a giant, angry eagle with razor-sharp talons. Beneath it, the caption: To Mock a Killing Bird. Sadly, this was the best idea I'd had in weeks.

As Mr. Darcy walked off, Elizabeth felt her blood turn cold. She had never in her life been so insulted. The warrior code demanded she avenge her honour. Elizabeth reached down to her ankle, taking care not to draw attention. There, her hand met the dagger concealed beneath her dress. She meant to follow this proud Mr. Darcy outside and open his throat. But

Elizabeth and Darcy laughed at the sight, and for a moment, resolved to keep walking -- as the zombies had failed to take notice of them. But, sharing a glance and a smile, the pair realised they had stumbled onto their first opportunity to fight side by side. And so they did.

I know of nobody that is coming, I am sure, unless Charlotte Lucas should happen to call in—and I am sure my dinners are good enough for her, since she is an unmarried woman of seven-and-twenty, and as such should expect little more than a crust of bread washed down with a cup of loneliness.

It is a strange thing how quickly the body dies. How fragile a force our presence is. In an instant the soul is gone—leaving an empty, insignificant vessel in its stead.

The business of Mr. Bennett's life was to keep his daughters alive. The business of Mrs. Bennett's was to get them married.

An empty theater is a promise unfulfilled.In a few hours, everything around him would be light and noise. Laughter and applause. Colorful people packed together in their colorful finery. Tonight, the promise would be fulfilled. And then, after the curtain came down and the gaslights were snuffed out, there would be darkness again. That was the beauty of it. That was theater.

Halloween, the one night when we embrace the darkness from which all of America is descended. October is the gateway to the wonderful, mystical finale of the American year. A place where life ends and the celebration of life briefly begins.

We must fight for our country and forget our differences. There can be but two parties: the party of patriots and the party of traitors ...

It's no wonder we're always getting' mistaken for queers. Look at us—a bunch'a proper men, never growin' old, 'angin' about in the dark, bitin' other men on the neck. They don't fear us 'cause we got claws and fangs; they fear us 'cause they think we're comin' after their sons.

I have read of the great wars of ages past, and men slaughtered by the tens of thousands. And we give but fleeting consideration to their deaths, for it is our nature to banish such thoughts.

First I become flush with righteous anger, which, if you must be angry, is the very best kind.

There are but two types of men who desire war: those who haven't the slightest intention of fighting it themselves, and those who haven't the slightest idea what it is.

The one thing people loved more than an outlaw was seeing him punished.

Either I'm right," he continued, "and he doesn't exist, or you're right, and he's the kind of God who watches children die. The kind of God who sits around while men like Herod build palaces and good people starve. Either way, he's not worth worshipping.

It is the sort of suffering that cannot be done justice with words. I can say only this—that I suspect it is an anguish from which one never recovers. A walking death.

Oh, a pipe smoker," said Henry. "Well, that narrows it down." "Sometimes," said Doyle, "there is nothing so significant as a trifle.

So I suggest you stick close, pay attention, and avoid breaking the Terrorverse's only commandment: Thou shall not be stupid. Now come with me if you want to live …

for he saw in Elizabeth's eyes a kind of darkness; a kind of absence-as if her soul had taken leave, so that compassion and warmth could not interfere.

History remembers Abe's towering intellect but forgets that, in those days, he was more towering than intellectual.

I do not expect I shall ever again have the opportunity of defending and murdering a client in the same day. - Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter

No; hatred had vanished long ago, and she had almost as long been ashamed of ever wishing to drink the blood from his severed head.

Well, it sure as hell weren't no tree-climbin' horse. (Jack to Abe)

Mr. Darcy approached them soon afterwards. Elizabeth turned to him and said, "Did you not think, Mr. Darcy, that I expressed myself uncommonly well just now, when I was teasing Colonel Forster to give us a ball at Meryton?" "With great energy; but balls are always a subject which makes a lady energetic.