Quotes from Maria Bamford

I have a hard time with interviews, because I'd rather hear about the interviewer.

When I'm up on stage and do a joke, half the people interpret it one way and half of them interpret it the way I want them to.

My mom is very structured. She gets up, she does her prayers, and she eats her oatmeal with blueberries and Greek yogurt, and she has her prayer list, and she doesn't worry too much about things.

I have trouble watching singers because they are so sincere.

People get really irritated by mental illness.

I do some compassionate mindfulness every day. It's like a Buddhist thing. I tell myself that I'm doing a good job, that kind of thing. It makes me feel better.

I'm sort of shy, and Twitter feels like chatting all day with a group. I like to follow people. I'm following Joel Osteen, Steve Martin, and an anonymous purple egg - just to see where they go with it.

The Internet makes everything much less mysterious.

In my stand up, I think I try to be less energetic because I feel embarrassed about how much enthusiasm I have. There's something about acting like I don't care, or if I act like I haven't spent enough time on it, it seems to go better. If I act like I'm really trying to sell it, it doesn't go as well.

I love festivals because they seem like more of an artsy, supportive attitude – which benefits a more theatrical performer sometimes with having theater and other non-club venues, as well as the audience being filled with other artists. It's nice to be with other comics, as usually at other road gigs, I'm solo for the most part.

I've been stopped a few times by people who want to say, 'Hi.' But I'm an introverted person, and the idea that I'd have to talk to people all the time seems a little overwhelming.

I think taking vacations and turning off the phone and only doing emails or social media for a specific short amount of time helps with work/life balance. If I'm checking it all day I start to feel cuckoo-bird. So I just do it once or twice a day instead of a thousand. And then remembering that it doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter.

In L.A., a lot of comics live here, but we don't get to spend that much time together because we've got to drive 45 minutes home, or do another set. So in San Francisco we can hang out, go for dinner - the community aspect of it is really lovely, as well as seeing people's shows that you don't normally get to see a longer version of.

I have a comic character - my sister said that I'm the victim of every joke I tell.

I'm not an extroverted person, nor am I hyper-confident in my point of view. I just don't have that personality.