Quotes from Arthur C. Brooks

What exactly is the next marshmallow? Do you know what you want as you start making new sacrifices?

2. DO YOUR CORE JOB

That's because you Westerners see art as being created from nothing. In the East, we believe the art already exists, and our job is simply to reveal it. It is not visible because we add something, but because we take away the parts that are not the art.

3. INVEST INTELLIGENTLY

In his 1964 book, Understanding Media, Marshall McLuhan famously said that "the medium is the message.

And so it is when we professionally self-objectify: Our work is our medium, which is our message. We love the image of ourselves as successful, not ourselves in true life. But you are not your job, and I (as I have to remind myself) am not mine.

At the nexus of enjoyable and meaningful is interesting.

As we age, we shouldn't accumulate more to represent ourselves but rather strip things away to find our true selves—and thus, to find our second curve.

Use things. Love people. Worship the divine.

Further, my connection to others makes my jump to the second curve all the more natural and normal. Indeed, the crystallized intelligence curve is predicated on interconnectedness. Without it, my wisdom has no outlet.

Robert Waldinger, popularized the study even more with a viral TED Talk, "What Makes a Good Life?

What I am not proud of is our increasing resistance to competing ideas, right here at home in our politics, in media, and on campuses. So how do we solve it? We need leaders who—while holding their own opinions—tolerate others', because they recognize that iron sharpens iron ideologically; that diversity in all forms is where our strength and unity are to be found.

Not only did he choose divine fulfillment over worldly specialness, he became an expert in this distinction. In his view, people who opt for the worldly path choose "substitutes for God": idols that objectify the idolater and never satisfy the craving for happiness.[5] Even if you are not a religious believer, his list rings true as the idols that attract us.

The point is to destroy your empathy for the object of his or her derision through dehumanization. Perhaps that seems like no big deal, but make no mistake: You are being manipulated to hate a fellow human being.

It's difficult to describe adequately the depth of the rewards that one enjoys when relationships become your "official" source of meaning and fulfillment. People compare it with finding buried treasure, with the only sadness being that it didn't happen earlier in life.

As we used to note, some conductors are evil geniuses, but all are evil.

There is a big scholarly literature on the high correlation between creative genius and mental suffering, which Sigmund Freud termed "the problem of the creative artist."[12]

We know in our hearts that the objectification of others is wrong and immoral. But it is easy to forget that we can do it to ourselves as well.

There are two pillars of happiness. . . . One is love. The other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away."[8] And just for good measure, he quotes Virgil: "Omnia vincit amor": Love conquers all.

My comfort in exploring and expressing new ideas appears inversely proportional to my sense of stability. Among other things, this book is the fruit of my transition.

intimate friendship, whether it be from the companionate love of your spouse or an Aristotelian "perfect friend," is better than any professional success. It will salve the wounds of professional decline like nothing else.

What happened after this exchange, though, is just as instructive. Colleagues made fun of john because of his "homeless girlfriend." This reveals a sobering truth. "Sometimes," says john, "there's a cost associated with bridging. And sometimes, the cost can be quite high.

Many mornings upon waking, my first thoughts are about my old work and friendships in Washington. I rub the sleep from my eyes, get up, and cast my line into the falling tide of the new day.

hold your success lightly—be ready to change as your abilities change. Even if your worldly prestige falls, lean into the changes.