Quotes from David Cross

I remember being a kid and the Vietnam War was huge and looking at Watergate.

I don't think HBO would want to do anything in conjunction with Sub Pop but I never asked either.

I'd be curious to find out, but I don't think people in the entertainment industry are proportionally more or less serious politically than anyone in the landscaping industry.

I'm concerned about organized religion getting away with what it gets away with.

In New York there isn't that weird palpable competitive thing where it's friendly but everyone isn't trying to top one another with jokes when you're just hanging around.

I think I'd be a really good dad. So perhaps I'm doing society a disservice by not having as many kids as possible.

As for Tenacious D, of course it could work as a full length movie; all it requires is a great writer and great director with an ability to think outside of conventional film comedy.

We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins.

I've had plenty of negative reviews. I have my entire life.

Occasionally I'll watch Fox News for as long as I can tolerate it, or CNN. I'll watch until I get infuriated, but you got to know what they're talking about and what they're not talking about.

[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's no time limit. Just sit there and grow old together.

It's not about trying to be funny all the time. It's more of a document that hopefully is funny.

I was heavily influenced by Andy Kaufman and Steven Wright.

There is nothing interesting about just seeing me doing the show then seeing the fans and how much people love me.

I'm pretty happy. I obviously have complaints about things, but for the most part, I'm on the above-average side of happy people.

Nobody is going to be as bad for free thinking, right-minded individuals than George Bush.

The best thing about me is there are no skeletons.

I love Tinkle, it's really the most fun I've had in years.

Religion triggers a lot of emotions in me, most of which stem from being raised Jewish in a very Baptist community in the South. I didn't believe any of it from an early age - the clubby quality of whatever religion or church you belonged to, Judaism included. It just struck me as foolish.

Hopefully people are upset for the reason I want them to be upset. Even when I was doing open mics, I've always had people upset. I've never been the consummate crowd-pleaser.

I think people, for the most part, actually want what they think is best.

If people disagree with me and want to articulate it, that's not only their right but almost their obligation.

I'm of the mindset that most people who have kids are, which is, 'Hey, I want another me. I like me. I'm pretty cool, and I've got really great ideas, and the way I think is the right way to think. Let's put another one of me out there.' So I'll have kids one day.

I have no hesitation doing children's movies. Zero. And I don't even have kids.