Quotes from Joe E. Lewis

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin.

I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise.

I've been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would have taken General Custer and given points.

I drink to forget I drink.

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my scotch, I say, I'm thirsty, not dirty.