Quotes from Tom Holt

I don't read the Sunday papers; or the dailies, either.

Everything is out there if you know how to find it, and have the patience. I don't and haven't, but that's my problem

There's nothing bad about reincarnation per se, it's basically a very good system, cost-effective and ecologically friendly.

Lawyers are predators in grey worsted.

After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something gives?

Luck, like a Russian car, generally only works if you push it.

New technology is useful, but it's inefficient and ugly; it knows it'll be obsolete by lunchtime tomorrow, so it has no incentive to be anything else

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot, sunny day. It's never really caught on in the UK, probably because the last time we had a hot, sunny day was back in 1957.

Human beings can get used to virtually anything, given plenty of time and no choice in the matter whatsoever.

At any given time, ninety-nine-point-nine-five per cent of the human race are a confounded nuisance

There's all sorts of things I was always meaning to get around to - learning to play the flute, calculating the square root of nought, going mad - but I just didn't have the time.

The best definition of an immortal is someone who hasn't died yet.

It was irritating to have one's physical shortcomings pointed out quite so plainly twice in one evening, once by a beautiful girl and once by a dying badger.

Having finally come to the end of this narrative, Malcolm was left with two abiding impressions: first, that Fafner the dragon, instead of keeping his money under the mattress like everyone else, had kept his mattress under the money; second, that humanity generally gets the Gods it deserves.

He believes it's time to redesign Evil from the ground up; to face the challenges and opportunities of a diverse, rapidly changing society. "He's thinking of calling it," said Miss Gold, "New Evil.

Luck isn't a wheelbarrow, Maurice; it works better if you don't push it. Stay

The worst punishment there is for wanting the wrong thing is getting it.

It was worth repeating, because it constituted the First Law of Sentient Ordnance: Thou shalt not blow up the wrong planet. On that point the programmers had been insistent to the point of fussiness. Accordingly

There comes a time when a man must stand up and do what he knows is Wrong.

After all, why be right when you can be happy.

If you keep things simple, and look to the end, not the problems in the way, most things turn out to be possible.

So; in the beginning was the Word, but ten nanoseconds later there was a twelve-volume dictionary, and ten nanoseconds after that a Library of Congress, with 90 per cent of the books in foreign languages. It's probably not possible after such a lapse of time to find out what the original Word was. Given the consequences, however, it could well have been oops.

You wouldn't think you could get bored falling to your death... But when it's a really, really long drop, there's a definite risk on ennui.

As usual when asked to think of something, Malcolm's mind went completely blank.