Quotes from Les Dawson

In awe I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebon void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang forever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought...I must put a roof on this lavatory.

My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.

Funny thing how you first meet the woman that you marry. I first met the wife in a tunnel of love. She was digging it.

Marriage is an institution and that's where a couple finish up.