Quotes from Lemony Snicket

If you enjoy books with happy endings than you are better off reading some other book.

Of course you can trust me," Jake Hix said. "We read the same books.

It is my fate that some of my questions will never be answered.

You're noble enough, Baudelaires. That's all we can ask for in this world.

Sometimes you can't really tell when you are happy until it is over and you are thinking about it later

I do what I do," I said, "in order to do something else.

He looked like the sort of person who would tell you that he did not have an umbrella to lend you when he actually had several and simply wanted to see you get soaked.

Are you who I think you are?

The library was one enormous room, with long, high metal shelves and the perfect quiet that libraries provide for anyone looking for an answer.

Young writers should read books past bedtime and write things down in notebooks when they are supposed to be doing something else.

I am certain that over the course of your own life, you have noticed that people's rooms reflect their personalities. In my room, for instance, I have gathered a collection of objects that are important to me, including a dusty accordion on which I can play a few sad songs, a large bundle of notes on the activities of the Baudelaire orphans, and a blurry photograph, taken a very long time ago, of a woman whose name is Beatrice. These are items that are very precious and dear to me.

Some people think destiny is something you cannot escape, such as death or a curdled cheesecake, both of which always turn up sooner or later.

Klaus sighed, and opened a book, and as at so many other times when the middle Baudelaire child did not want to think about his circumstances, he began to read.

If you were upset about an ugly pimple on the end of your nose, you might try to feel better by keeping your pimple in perspective. You might compare your pimple situation to that of someone who was being eaten by a bear, and when you looked in the mirror at your ugly pimple, you could say to yourself, 'Well, at least I'm not being eaten by a bear.

Wherever there's a conductor, you're sure to find a dead composer!

Nobody should feel pain all by themselves.

bravery often demands a price.

Everyone tells you it's all right to cry, but not enough people say it's all right if you don't want people to know.

Tell me what it is, or prepare to eat harpoon.

You cannot have a really terrific library without at least one terrific librarian, the way you cannot have a really terrific bedroom unless you can lock the door.

I didn't realize this was a sad occasion.

What a schmuck!

Even the best plans can change if there's an accident.

You must be all a-tingle with excitement.' 'I guess so,' I said, but I did not feel a-tingle. I did not feel a-anything.