Quotes from Lori Gottlieb

Will you see my vulnerabilities, my lies, my shame? Will you see the human in my being?

Falling in love never gets old. No matter how jaded you are, how much suffering love has caused you, a new love can't help but make you feel hopeful and alive, like that very first time

Happiness equals reality minus expectations. Apparently, you can make people happy by delivering bad news and then taking it back

Tem a expressão intensa, mas gentil, uma combinação de ancião sábio com bichinho de pelúcia, e vem com uma mensagem: Nesta sala, vou te ver e você tentará se esconder, mas mesmo assim te verei, e tudo bem que seja assim.

By focusing on one external calamity after another, Charlotte has been distracting herself from the real crises in her life—the internal ones. Sometimes "drama," no matter how unpleasant, can be a form of self-medication, a way to calm ourselves down by avoiding the crises brewing inside.

Rather than steering people straight to the heart of the problem, we nudge them to arrive there on their own, because the most powerful truths—the ones people take the most seriously—are those they come to, little by little, on their own.

I know how affirming it feels to blame the outside world for my frustrations, to deny ownership of whatever role I might have in the existential play called My Incredibly Important Life. I know what it's like to bathe in self-righteous outrage, in the certainty that I'm completely right and have been terribly wronged, because that's exactly how I've felt all day.

she didn't want to just add things to her bucket list; she wanted to cross things off too. "You have to pare it down," she said, "or else it's just a useless exercise in what could have been.

She wasn't willing to look at what she was doing that made it difficult for people to give her what she wanted.

I have a feeling that there's a lot of buried love between John and Margo because I know this: love can often look like so many things that don't seem like love.

It's not about lowering your standards—it's about maturing and having reasonable expectations.

There's a difference between pain and suffering," Wendell says. "You're going to have to feel pain—everyone feels pain at times—but you don't have to suffer so much. You're not choosing the pain, but you're choosing the suffering.

Life has a 100 percent mortality rate. Every single one of us will die, and most of us have no idea how or when that will happen. In fact, as each second passes, we're all in the process of coming closer to our eventual deaths. As the saying goes, none of us will get out of here alive.

I hadn't considered that if the only thing that keeps you going all day is knowing you'll get to turn on the TV after dinner, you probably are depressed.

Not knowing is a good place to start," he says, and this feels like a revelation. I

Looking death in the eye would force them to live more fully—not in the future, with some long list of goals, but right now.

transformations come about from the hundreds of tiny, almost imperceptible, steps we take along the way.

It's not that she's hiding her feelings; it's that she can't access them. There's a word for this kind of emotional blindness: alexithymia. She doesn't know what she's feeling or doesn't have the words to express it.

Is there anything that makes us feel more vulnerable than asking someone, Do you like me?

People often mistake numbness for nothingness, but numbness isn't the absence of feelings; it's a response to being overwhelmed

Certainly we all have our deal-breakers. But when patients repeatedly engage in this kind of analysis, sometimes I'll say, "If the queen had balls, she'd be the king." If you go through life picking and choosing, if you don't recognize that "the perfect is the enemy of the good," you may deprive yourself of joy. At first patients are taken aback by my bluntness, but ultimately it saves them months of treatment.

When the present falls apart, so does the future we had associated with it. But if we spend the present trying to fix the past or control the future, we remain stuck in place, in perpetual regret.

Every person you've been close to lives on somewhere inside you.

Your feelings don't have to mesh with what you think they should be," he explained. "They'll be there regardless, so you might as well welcome them