Quotes from Lilian Jackson Braun

A cat without a tail is better than a politician without a head. Theres a destiny that leads a hungry cat to the right doorstep. Home is where the sardines are. No matter how humble, a free meal is not to be sniffed at. Where theres a will, a cat will find a way. Soft cushions are for catsall others use them at their own risk. What goes down must come up, if its a pill.

Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London is full of women of the highest society who have remained thirty-five for years.

wandered lonely as a cloud That floats on high o'er vales and hills, When all at once I saw a crowd, A host, of golden daffodils.

cool koko also says Dumb animals know more about humans than dumb humans know about animals.

Pedestrians were few, and cars barreled past with whining snow tires, in a hurry to be elsewhere.

Apple barn's better'n a pig barn," they chortled over coffee mugs in the cafés. After four years they had become accustomed to the sight of Mr. Q's oversize moustache with its melancholy droop. They no longer questioned the unorthodox W in the spelling of Qwilleran. And most of them now accepted the fact that the middle-aged divorced bachelor chose to live alone—with two cats!

just a pied-à-terre that he uses for business entertaining, but it's tastefully done in wall-to-wall money. And the colors are smart—in a ghastly way. I've used Eggplant, Spinach, and Overripe Melon.

I only know that a wise man once said three hundred years ago that money is like muck; it doesn't do any good unless you spread it around.

relic from an old schoolhouse: a cast-iron base

We designed the house to go with her looks.

You never forgot those old movies, Qwill. You still want reporters to type with their hats on and poke the keys with two fingers.

Mickey Maus," William was saying, "is a nut about butter. The only time he ever lost his cool was when we were having a small brunch and we were down to our last three pounds of butter. He panicked.

She gazed into space, afflicted by sudden deafness, a common disorder in felines.

You know what they say: All Welshmen sing. All Scots are thrifty. All Englishmen have stiff upper lips. And all Irishmen write plays.

What a touching domestic scene! I suppose the demographers have you classified as an untraditional family: one man, two cats." "One man, two animal companions," he corrected her.

Qwilleran drove with clenched jaw, enduring the stares and glares of motorists who passed him, their fretful horn-honking and hostile tailgating.

The Siamese had finished their three-hour morning nap and had not yet settled down for their four-hour afternoon siesta. It was their Mischief Hour. Yum Yum was batting a pencil she had stolen from the writing table, and Koko was parading around with a sweat sock that Qwilleran used for biking.

An object that has been owned and cherished by other human beings for centuries develops a personality of its own that reaches out to you. It's like an old friend. Do

Billions are spent for neurophysiological research to control human behavior, he reflected. Beauty shops would be cheaper.

Qwilleran worked hard and fast at the office that day, while the clerk in the Feature Department intercepted all phone calls and uninvited visitors with the simple explanation that permits no appeal, no argument, no exceptions. "Sorry, he's on deadline.

Got a better theory?

the caller might say abruptly, 'Whoozis?' In that case I would say grandly, '*Whom* are you calling, sir?' And he would hang up immediately without even an expletive. Of all the four-letter words I know, the speediest turn-off in such circumstances is *whom*.

Qwilleran closed the door and turned to Koko. 'How did you react to the noisy oaf?' Koko laid his ears back. Qwilleran thought, No one has ever called him kitty. A more appropriate form of address would be Your Excellency or Your Eminence.

the canvas had disfigured it. Koko squirmed and squealed and made himself