Quotes from Lilian Jackson Braun

Qwilleran said, "If I had a dog, it would be a German shepherd.

As Qwilleran approached it a squirrel ran up a tree, looked down at him, and scolded.

For he's good to think on if a man would express himself neatly.

The fact that Kristi was an attractive young woman had nothing to do with his enthusiastic speculations, he told himself.

At dinner time he would sit in a corner, concentrating; and suddenly they would say, 'Time to feed the cat,' as if it were their idea.

Cats hate a closed door, you know, regardless of which side they're on. If they're out, they want to get in, and if they're in, they want to get out.

The way to test a man's sincerity is to serve him a bad cup of coffee. If he doesn't comment, he is not to be trusted.

Dogs have their day but cats have 365.

Cats are cats . . . the world over! These intelligent, peace-loving, four-footed friends- who are without prejudice, without hate, without greed- may someday teach us something. -James Mackintosh Qwilleran

People who really appreciated animals always asked their names.

Beware of the clever ones; the dumb ones are safer.

A library card is the start of a lifelong adventure.

if you've never been cussed out by a Siamese, you don't know what profanity is all about!

Are those cat hairs on your lapel, or have you been dating a blonde with a crew cut?

When you don't know what to do with yourself, do something for someone else.

Small birds throw seeds out of the feeder; large birds pick them up off the ground, but the squirrels try to muscle in.

I'm beginning to be skeptical of my own skepticism.

Cats are fond of mooning.

Every Dog Has A Day But A Cat Has 365

Phut Phat knew, at an early age, that humans were an inferior breed. They were unable to see in the dark. They ate and drank unthinkable concoctions. And they had only five senses; the pair who lived with Phut Phat could not even transmit their thoughts without resorting to words.

A female feline named Katta Is getting fatta and fatta But she's pretty and purry And funny and furry So what does an ounce or two matta?

She had white cat hair on her dark suit, she was a dedicated cat hugger.

He's our rodent control officer. He doesn't catch mice, he just terrifies them.

Meanwhile, news has been leaked to the press that the Hero of Drummond Street will be pictured on the cover of a national magazine, nude.