Quotes from Robert Lynn Asprin

When things are at their blackest, I say to myself, 'Cheer up, things could be worse.' And sure enough, they get worse.

When old friends get together, everything else fades to insignificance.- War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall take flack from both sides.- Unofficial UN Motto

Numerical superiority is of no consequence. In battle, victory will go to the best tactician.- G. A. Custer

C'mon kid. Think a minute, even if it hurts.

Just a little off the top!- A. Boleyn

Diplomacy is the delicate weapon of the civilized warrior.- Hun, A. T.

Don't pick up hitchhikers!- D. Adams

Everybody needs a career manager.- Lady Macbeth

Meanwhile, back at reality...- G.Lucas

Now that we've got the whole story, he said solemnly, now you can panic.

To Serve and Protect...- Traditional Motto of Protection Rackets

Well, kid, Aahz said, sweeping me with an appraising stare, it looks like we're stuck with each other. The setup isn't ideal, but it's what we've got. Time to bite the bullet and play with the cards we're dealt. You do know what cards are, don't you? Of course, I said, slightly wounded. Good. What's a bullet?

We've got an unbeatable team.- Sauron

There's gotta be a way out of this dungeon.- G. Gygax

One of the worst ways of being aroused from sound sleep, is by the noise of a dragon and a unicorn playing tag.

Please ta meetcha, kid. I'm Aahz. Oz? No Relation. No relation to what? I asked, but he was examining the room again.

To function efficiently, any group of people or employees must have faith in their leader.- Capt. Bligh(ret.)

They never let you live it down. One little mistake!- Nero

Run through those time measurements again, Aahz grumbled. In seconds, minutes, hours.... Minutes! We've got a few minutes.

Relax, Skeeve! This'll be easy, Skeeve! Trust me, Skeeve!' Boy Aahz, when you miss a call you don't do it small, do you? Shut up, kid!

Relax, Stranger. Things are not as they seem.

My colleagues and I feel that independents like ElfQuest are nothing but sheep in wolves' clothing.- S. Lee

I should of known he was married. I mean, nobody that young is THAT bald unless he's got a wife at home.