Quotes About Boundaries

Some doors slammed in your face need to be glued and nailed shut so they can never be reopened.

Have a clear wall of defence between you and your work. The world can judge your work, but that does not define who you are. You are capable of decisiveness, clarity and greatness.

My limits are of my own making, and are there for the breaking

Breaking out beyond London's green belt was, and remains, like crossing the border into another country altogether.

Breaking Free Activity #34 Are there any areas in your personal relationships in which you avoid setting appropriate boundaries? Do you: •?Tolerate intolerable behavior. •?Avoid dealing with a situation because it might cause conflict. •?Not ask for what you want. •?Sacrifice yourself to keep the peace. If you applied the Second Date rule or the Healthy Male rule to these situations, how might you change your behavior?

In time, they also learn that boundary setting isn't about getting other people to be different. It's about getting themselves to be different. If someone is crossing their boundary, it isn't the other person's problem; it is theirs.

By trying to please everyone, Nice Guys often end up pleasing no one — including themselves.

Since Nice Guys learned to sacrifice themselves in order to survive, recovery must center on learning to put themselves first and making their needs a priority.

Personal power is the result of feeling fear, but not giving in to the fear. There is a solution to the helplessness and vulnerability Nice Guys feel. Recovery from the Nice Guy Syndrome allows Nice Guys to embrace the personal power that is their birthright. Reclaiming personal power includes: •?Surrendering. •?Dwelling in reality. •?Expressing feelings. •?Facing fears. •?Developing integrity. •?Setting boundaries.

Enchanted islands are hard to understand,' he said. 'I've always thought that. It worried me even as a child. The trouble is that you can never be sure where the enchantment begins and where it ends.

The time to react protectively is when we feel ourselves liking the practitioner more than we should under the circumstances.

Mothers sometimes are overly possessive, but not all children allow themselves to be possessed.

Stubbornly persist, and you will find that the limits of your stubbornness go well beyond the stubbornness of your limits.

If you haven't time to respond to a tug at your pants leg, your schedule is too crowded.

Nature decrees that we do not exceed the speed of light. All other impossibilities are optional.

What you must accept as a parent is that you cannot always be there for your child without sometimes ruining everything.

The trouble with having a body is that people know it's where you hang out and you don't get any privacy.

I am a private person, but I will reveal this about myself: if you start massaging my shoulders, don't expect me to tell you to stop.

Another problem with service-level decoupling is that it is expensive, both in development time and in system resources. Dealing with service boundaries where none are needed is a waste of effort, memory, and cycles. And, yes, I know that the last two are cheap—but the first is not.

Providing too much detail can be an invitation for micro-management.

This is the philosophy of YAGNI: "You aren't going to need it." There is wisdom in this message, since over-engineering is often much worse than under-engineering. On the other hand, when you discover that you truly do need an architectural boundary where none exists, the costs and risks can be very high to add such a boundary.

Software architecture is the art of drawing lines that I call boundaries. Those boundaries separate software elements from one another, and restrict those on one side from knowing about those on the other.

The architecture of a system is defined by a set of software components and the boundaries that separate them.

WHICH LINES DO YOU DRAW, AND WHEN DO YOU DRAW THEM? You draw lines between things that matter and things that don't. The GUI doesn't matter to the business rules, so there should be a line between them. The database doesn't matter to the GUI, so there should be a line between them. The database doesn't matter to the business rules, so there should be a line between them.