Quotes About Discipline

They need to know what our expectations are, and how we will respond if they break (or even bend) agreed-upon rules.

instead of a time-out, you might ask her to practice handling a situation differently. If she's being disrespectful in her tone or words, you can have her try it again and communicate what she's saying respectfully. If she's been mean to her brother, you might ask her to find three kind things to do for him before bedtime. That way, the repeated experience of positive behavior begins to get wired in her brain. (Again,

If you're in a public place and your child is disturbing everyone around you, it may be necessary to take him outside while you attempt to appeal to his upstairs brain.)

And our disciplinary decisions go a long way toward determining how strong those connections are. The way we interact with our kids when they're upset significantly affects how their brains develop, and therefore what kind of people they are, both today and in the years to come.

When we set limits, we help develop the parts of the upstairs brain that allow children to control themselves and regulate their behaviors and their body.

You can discipline in a way that's high on relationship, high on respect, and low on drama and conflict—and

When your child is disrespectful and talks back to you, when you are asked to come in for a meeting with the principal, when you find crayon scribbles all over your wall: these are survive moments, no question about it. But at the same time, they are opportunities—even gifts—because a survive moment is also a thrive moment, where the important, meaningful work of parenting takes place.

No-Drama Discipline allows us to communicate to our children, "I'm with you. I've got your back. Even when you're at your worst and I don't like the way you're acting, I love you, and I'm here for you. I understand you're having a hard time, and I am here.

In other words, deep, empathic connection can and should be combined with clear and firm boundaries that create needed structure in children's lives.

Para nosotros, imponer disciplina se reduce a una simple frase: conectar y redirigir. Nuestra primera respuesta debe ser siempre ofrecer conexión tranquilizadora; a continuación podemos redirigir conductas. Incluso cuando decimos «no» al comportamiento de los niños, siempre hemos de decir «sí» a sus emociones y a su manera de experimentar las cosas.

NUESTRA DISCIPLINA SE BASA EN EL CASTIGO Y NO EN LA ENSEÑANZA El propósito de la disciplina no es asegurarnos de que cada infracción tenga su correspondiente castigo. El objetivo real es enseñar a los niños a vivir bien en el mundo. Sin

CREEMOS QUE SI ESTAMOS IMPONIENDO DISCIPLINA, NO PODEMOS SER AFECTUOSOS Y ACOGEDORES Mientras impones disciplina a tu hijo, puedes estar perfectamente tranquilo, además de mostrarte cálido y cariñoso. De hecho, es importante combinar límites claros y coherentes con empatía afectuosa. No subestimes el poder de un tono amable de voz cuando mantienes con tu hijo una conversación sobre la conducta que quieres cambiar. En

You won't always be able to discipline in a way that both connects and redirects.

So does that give them a get-out-of-jail-free card ("Sorry, Mom, that I squirted our new puppy's face with Windex. I guess my upstairs brain wasn't fully engaged")? Hardly. In fact, it actually gives us parents even more incentive to see that our kids develop the faculties that result in appropriate behavior.

when we need to say no to their behavior and redirect them toward appropriate action.

Essentially, we want caregivers to begin to think of discipline as one of the most loving and nurturing things we can do for kids.

parent who recognizes an upstairs tantrum is left with one clear response: never negotiate with a terrorist. An upstairs tantrum calls for firm boundaries and a clear discussion about appropriate and inappropriate behavior.

remember how important it is to discipline this one child in this one moment.

When we avoid bringing extra chaos and drama to disciplinary situations—in other words, when we combine clear and consistent limits with loving empathy—everyone wins.

Another problem with spanking is that it teaches the child that the parent has no effective strategy short of inflicting bodily pain. That's a direct lesson every parent should consider quite deeply: do we want to teach our kids that the way to resolve a conflict is to inflict physical pain, particularly on someone who is defenseless and cannot fight back?

It means being there for your kids. It means being physically present, as well as providing a quality of presence. Provide it when you're meeting their needs; when you're expressing your love to them; when you're disciplining them; when you're laughing together; even when you're arguing with them.

We discussed the importance of setting limits, creating structure, and helping children build internal controls and impulse inhibition by internalizing "no." This is how we use our relationship with

Recall that discipline means to teach, not to punish.

Curiosity is the cornerstone of effective discipline. Before