Quotes About Humor

I would love to host 'Saturday Night Live.' That's one of my goals in life - just putting that out there. I don't know if I'm funny enough, but we'll see.

I remember my wife and I used to get on plane and see everybody else with their babies. They'd be putting strollers and car seats up above, and we'd think: Oh, please Lord, don't make us go through that.

I like to inject a bit of production value and flair to comedy, or at least to my little corner of comedy.

I can be a bit movement-orientated and flamboyant because, essentially, I'm a physical comedian.

The first day of shooting I walk up to Christopher Walken, and I said, Should I call you Mr. Walken or Chris? He goes, 'Call me Flash.'

I don't like my feet. I'm not crazy about anybody's feet. But I have flat feet.

One joke coming from one person can land completely flat, while somebody else delivering it in a unique way can really elevate it.

Our first flat, in South-West London, was a pig-sty. Dec couldn't even cook baked beans. We were like 'Men Behaving Badly.'

He is like a bad dog, Bez. We lived together in a flat and if you didn't get up before him, he would get up and he would take your clothes.

That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't.

I would make a few jabs at myself and go for the audience - they are still as flawed as ever.

If I tried to flirt with a woman and she didn't know who I was, she would run away.

I am a rubbish flirt.

Flirting is funny. And it's awkward and weird.

I've been told I'm really bad at flirting.

There is so much competition and content floating around right now, so comedy has to have a lot quirk and heart.

As an older dad you can certainly get down on the floor. The problem is can you get up again?

I just go to work, come home. And my wife lets me throw my clothes on the floor, and she doesn't say anything, so I must be making some money.

I have very short arms. I can't really reach down and pick things off the floor when they fall. I can't really reach up and get things out of the cupboard.

The Florida Gator head is long and funny looking. It scrapes my nose. Every time I put that thing on I get scraped and blood comes down my face.

You cannot control another human being, and you just have to learn to go with the flow and laugh at yourself, in whatever capacity.

I buy flowers for myself all the time. I'm comedy's Elton John.

I fly around with chicks on each arm and have no script. I just talk about what I feel like. But that's why my act works: I'm like this normal guy.

I didn't like flying - although not in a 'Mr T' way.