Quotes About Drunk

Being drunk really brought out her inner vicious bitch.

Locke blinked and cursed his condition; he'd heard sailors talk of "dry drunk"—the stupidity, weakness, and irritability that seized a man in great want of water

Hardship is boring as hell. Gotta find laughs if you can't stay drunk.

A man walks into a bar with a giraffe and they proceed to get loaded. The giraffe drinks so much it passes out on the floor. The man gets up and heads for the door when the bartender yells, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" The drunk replies, "That's no lion! It's a giraffe.

A man is stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulls up and says, "Mister, I've got to take you in. You're clearly drunk." The man asks, "Officer, are you absolutely sure I'm drunk?" "Yeah," the cop says, "I'm sure. Let's go." Obviously relieved, the man says, "Thanks a million, officer. I thought I was a cripple.

Q: What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake? A: One less drunk.

Q: What's the mating call of the blonde? A: "I am sooooo drunk!

I don't believe he was ever dhrunk in his life - sure he's not like a Christian at all!

I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.

In order not to feel time's horrid fardel bruise your shoulders, grinding you into the earth, get drunk and stay that way. On what? On wine, poetry, virtue, whatever. But get drunk!

Has anyone ever won an argument with you? (Syd) Just Tee, and I was drunk and wounded at the time. (Joe)

I dont know why everybody is giving Prince Harry a hard time. Hes like every other red-blooded American man - he wants to get drunk and go out with hookers.

He had been drunk over in town, and laid in the gutter all night, and he was a sight to look at. A body would a thought he was Adam, he was just all mud.

First they done a lecture on temperance; but they didn't make enough for them both to get drunk on. Then in another village they started a dancing-school; but they didn't know no more how to dance than a kangaroo does; so the first prance they made the general public jumped in and pranced them out of town. Another time they tried to go at yellocution; but they didn't yellocute long till the audience got up and give them a solid good cussing, and made them skip out.

music--music to make one drunk with pleasure, music to make one take scrip and staff and beg his way round the globe to hear it.

it swallows gas like a drunk, but a man who lets guilt ruin pleasure is the pincushion of fate.

My grandfather blasted in. Aw now, hell, carolyn, don't go twisting the boy back up in knots all over again now that you finally got him straightened out. They aren't leprechauns, son. they're elves. Leprechauns are those little drunk motherfuckers from Ireland.

I just had way too much energy for six A.M. Too much motivation. It was like the drunk side of my brain was trying to act distracting and entertaining, so the business side wouldn't realize it was being held hostage by a drunk. I

If you loathe your job, the situation is improved if you can do it in your underwear. Drunk. *

The ' pleasure' of being drunk is obviously the pleasure of escaping from the responsibility of Consciousness.

When all the decent pleasures are forbidden, there's always ways to get the rotten ones. You don't break into grocery stores after dark and you don't pick your fellow's pockets to buy classical symphonies or fishing tackle, but if it's to get stinking drunk and forget you do.

He is drunk at least 22 hours of every 24 and never without one or two whores in company.")

The family watched It's a Wonderful Life, which is a very beautiful movie and all I could think was why didn't they make a movie about uncle Billy?...Because he was a drunk and fat and lost all that money in the first place. I wanted an angel to come down and show us how uncle Billy's life had meaning

I was drunk but not drunk enough to say what I wanted, that we don't live our lives so much as come to them, as different people and things collect mysteriously around us.