Quotes About Comedy

Q: Why did the orange go to the hospital? A: It wasn't peeling well.

Q: What did one toilet say to the other toilet? A: You look a little flushed.

Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? A: In case he got a hole in one.

Q: What do you call a bunny with a crooked penis? A: Fucks funny.

Q: Why are there only 238 beans in Irish chili? A: Because just two more makes it two-farty.

Q: What kind of bees give you milk? A: Boobees.

Q: What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? A: If we don't get some support soon, people are going to think we're nuts.

Two blondes are walking down the street. One reaches into her purse for a makeup compact and looks into the mirror. "This picture looks like someone I know," she says. Her blonde friend has a look and says, "Of course, dummy. It's me!

Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator? A: "Why are you shaking? I'm the one she's gonna eat.

Q: What did the blonde say when she opened the box of Cheerios? A: "Honey, look at this—doughnut seeds.

Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic lawyer? A: He studied all year for the bra exam.

Q: What do you call a cow that won't give milk? A: A milk dud.

Q: What sort of farts do you get by mixing beans and onions? A: Tear gas.

Q: What's the mating call of the blonde? A: "I am sooooo drunk!

Q: Why did the stoner cross the road? A: His dealer lived on the other side.

Q: Did you hear about the new pirate movie? A: It's rated aaaargh.

No wonder I'm anxious: I'm like Woody Allen trapped in John Calvin.

I think Canadian humor is a little less broad than American humor.

comedy is a high form of art becaus it brings us more joy than anything else, practically but at the same time, it doesn't get a lot of respect. that's the sacrifice you make to do it.

Culturally, I think 'All in the Family' was universal enough to have good timing at any time.

It's sad and upsetting when you see somebody crying hysterically, but at the same time it's real funny.

Most of the time, my favorite drama has comedy in it as well. I think most good dramas have comedy in there. And all of the dramatic actors I look up to are also very funny.

Every time I wrote a sketch that was in my voice, Ferrell would just do it better.

SNL is a home. You've got all of your brothers and sisters there, and it's a great time.