Quotes About Comedy

Everyone else in the 'iCarly' cast can operate on 5 hours of sleep, but not so for 'Old Man Nathan!'

For some comedians it feels so cool to be like: 'I'll say anything, man!'. I'm not quite there yet.

I'll work with Jerry Seinfeld any day of the week. Get a nice little paycheck there, but you do it for free. It's just good to be associated with that man. He's a great guy.

Middle age is the time of life that a man first notices in his wife.

In a blackout, a Polish man was stuck on an escalator for two hours. I asked him, "Why didn't you walk down?" He said, "because I was going up!"

I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin.

So I went to buy a watch, and the man in the shop said "Analogue." I said "No, just a watch."

I don't think that women necessarily always write like women. I was a writer on the Comedy Central Roasts for a while, and I always wrote the jokes that people assumed the men would write.

The man I adored, and miss him terribly, was Johnny Carson.

I remember once having to stop performing when I thought an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually going to die because he was laughing so hard.

Donald Trump is on the show tonight. Donald is a big man, I think 230 pounds -- 235 with cologne.

The basis of tragedy is man's helplessness against disease, war and death; the basis of comedy is man's helplessness against vanity (the vanity of love, greed, lust, power).

Lenny Bruce is a very moral man trying to improve the world and trying to make audiences think

He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.

Women mostly remember the men who made them laugh, and men - only the women who made them cry.

My father was the funniest man I ever met. He made Redd Foxx look like an undertaker.

Don't U want someone to complete you the way Mini-Me completed Dr. Evil? Someone who shares the same tastes in music food who will finish … my sentences? The last thing I need is someone stealing the punch lines to all my jokes.

I refused David Letterman's proposal of marriage for obvious reasons, but thanks for asking.

Devils can be quite comical little animals, intense and wild. The Looney Tunes cartoon character "Taz" is an exaggeration, of course, because devils only spin like Taz if they're kept too confined.

You find out in life that people really like you funny. So what do you give em? Humor. And if you show them the other side, they don't like you as much. I find, too, that I can hide behind the idiot 's mask being funny, and you never see the sorrow or the pain.

They make Spy Kids, they make Scream, they make A Scary Movie. This doesn't do that, so it could be a very bad marriage. I'm trying to keep this potential nightmare quiet because we're just finishing editing.

On the stage you're there, it's live. There's a beginning, a middle, an end. When something is funny you hear it right away.

Hammy: did that rat get away? Theoniono: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Hammy: oh ok...

Warren Franks and Beans Franks and Beans