Quotes About Reality

For some strange reason, no matter where I go, the place is always called "here".

When people say "clean as a whistle", they forget that a whistle is full of spit.

Dude, are my eyes seeing what my brain is telling my eyes that they're seeing?

Ten years after the Chernobyl accident, and am I the only one that's disappointed? Still no superheros.

It's funny with fiction - once you cut something, it hasn't happened anymore.

I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

Hollywood, we decided, was a nice place to die, but we wouldn't want to live there.

I didn't see the time, largely because there wasn't one.

Like a cartoon world, where the figures are flat and outlined in black, jerking through some kind of goofy story that might be real funny if it weren't for the cartoon figures being real guys.

We drink and we die and continue to drink.

Allow me to put the record straight. I am forty-six and have been for some years past.

I think the best comedic actors don't play it for comedy, they play it for reality. Then you find it funny because it's real. Playing the genre is the worst thing you can do - it's embarrassing.

I think maybe to survive, I mean to just get through the day - I'm not saying that everything is hilariously funny.

Real racist jokes or sexist jokes aren't funny - not because they're offensive, but because they're not true. As soon as a joke is based on an untruth, it's not funny.

Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.

Its funny how you can let yourself forget for seconds, how even in the heat of the horrible, you can have moments when you fool yourself into thinking it might all be okay

There is nothing funny about aging: It is rotten and depressing. Anyone who tells you otherwise just hasn't been paying attention.

The movies are funny, in one way, because you think of everyone being as beautiful as the dawn, but that isn't true.

My way of looking at the world is that if it is true, it is funny and it is dark. No matter how dark it is, I just think it is funny. I can't help it.

They want to deceive their people first because now they are in a very shabby situation

It is really funny to see people that you know acting unpleasantly just because there are TV cameras on.

Anything that's really grounded in humanity and is real, but just happens to be faux pas, or just really shouldn't be funny, I like it.

Just because the kid's cute, doesn't mean you're not the father.

If a homeless person has a funny sign, he hasn't been homeless for that long. A real homeless person is too hungry to be funny.