Quotes About Defensiveness

if you want to see the ego go to DEFCON 1, get anywhere close to shame. What makes embracing vulnerability feel the most terrifying is how taking off the armor and exposing our hearts can open us up to experiencing shame. Our egos are willing to keep our hearts encased in armor, no matter the cost, if we can avoid feeling "less than" or unworthy of love and belonging.

Contempt is one of the most damaging of the four negative communication patterns that predict divorce. The other three are criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling

Perfeccionismo não é se esforçar para a excelência. Perfeccionismo não tem a ver com conquistas saudáveis e crescimento. Perfeccionismo é um movimento defensivo. É a crença de que, se fizermos as coisas com perfeição e parecermos perfeitos, poderemos minimizar ou evitar a dor da culpa, do julgamento e da vergonha.

Whenever I allow anything but tenderness and compassion to dictate my response to life--be it self-righteous anger, moralizing, defensiveness, the pressing need to change others...I am alienated from my true self. My identity as Abba's child [a child of God] becomes ambiguous, tentative and confused

Biri ç?k?p bizim düÅŸüncemizin tersini söyledi mi, onun doÄŸru söyleyip söylemediÄŸine deÄŸil, doÄŸru yanl??, kendi düÅŸüncemizi savunmaya bakar?z. Bizi düzeltmek isteyene kollar?m?z? açacak yerde, yumruklar?m?z? s?k?yoruz.

When you take things personally, then you feel offended, and your reaction is to defend your beliefs and create conflicts. You make something big out of something so little, because you have the need to be right and make everybody else wrong.

Cuando creemos algo, suponemos que tenemos razón hasta el punto de llegar a destruir nuestras relaciones para defender nuestra posición.

El vértigo es algo diferente del miedo a la caída. El vértigo significa que la profundidad que se abre ante nosotros nos atrae, nos seduce, despierta en nosotros el deseo de caer, del cual nos defendemos espantados.

The haughty do but build castle walls behind which they try to hide their doubts and fears.

cuando alguien me decía algo que era verdad, me daba cuenta de ello porque me ponía a la defensiva de inmediato

People who for whatever reason don't want to see the truth can be acutely hostile to it and shrill in their denunciation of it. They frequently turn their venomous antagonism on whoever dares to point out that truth.

Asking someone to repeat a phrase you'd not only heard very clearly but were also exceedingly angry about was around Defcon II in the lexicon of squabble.

Because if you are fresh from the hazing of PhD training, you are: insecure, defensive, paranoid, beset by feelings of inadequacy, pretentious, self-involved, communicatively challenged, and fixated on minutiae.

That was his phrase - "the high ramparts of my defensiveness"- and I remembered it in case I ever decide to build and then describe my own ramparts.

Most people, at least much of the time, live in a state of defensiveness. Chronic defensiveness not only fatigues us, it also keeps us from being in a state of openness to healing and receiving more energy.

What tended to happen, to Colin and Mary at least, was that subjects were not explored so much as defensively reiterated, or forced into elaborate irrelevancies, and suffused with irritability.

For a lot of white people, just suggesting that being white has meaning will trigger a deep, defensive response. And that defensiveness serves to maintain both our comfort and our positions in a racially inequitable society from which we benefit.

Reactionary: One who wants the rules enforced so nobody can take his pile away from him the way he got it from others.

Men. It's all about saving face. Every argument, every duel, every battle, every war. You would level a world to keep from being made to look a fool. And so you shall.

Recognize defensiveness as an attempt to keep new insights from entering your mental field.

The universe will teach us our lessons with the tickle of a feather or the whomp of a sledgehammer, depending on how open we are to learning the particular lesson. Getting stubborn and defensive invites the sledgehammer; getting open and curious invites the feather.

All men are homosexual, some turn straight. It must be very odd to be a straight man because your sexuality is hopelessly defensive. It's like an ideal of racial purity.

The ego does not want to be wrong, ever.

Arrogance is the armour of the weak. They are always at war to hide their real self.