Quotes About George Carlin

One time. In 1965. August, for about an hour, I was both fine AND dandy at the same time. But nobody asked me how I was.

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

I look to icons like George Carlin, Chris Rock, and Richard Pryor on how to present these concepts of social change and subversiveness to an audience in a way that's palatable.

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.

Life is also, as George Carlin taught us, a zero-sum game. We all lose in the end. We all die screaming. If that's the case, we might as well make for ourselves a paradise in this world. Make yourself happy and comfortable as often as you can, because sooner or later, the infinite hands you a bill for all these goods and services. What

I was never a pipe or bong man. That's California stuff. I was an Eastern roller.

I was a huge fan of comedy and movies and TV growing up, and I was able to memorize and mimic a lot of things, not realizing that that meant I probably wanted to be an actor. I just really, really amused myself and my friends with memorizing entire George Carlin or Steve Martin albums.

I did stand-up. I loved George Carlin and Steve Martin.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

Comedy, although it is not one of the fine arts - it's a vulgar art, it's one of the people's arts, it's the spoken word, the writing that goes into it is an art form - it's certainly artistry.

By playing to what's most politically correct, I worry we'll never be challenged by the brilliant insights from the next generation's George Carlin and Lenny Bruce, that we'll lose what's genuine and uncomfortable and forces us into introspection

If you have a legal problem, guess how you determine whether or not you need a lawyer. You see a lawyer. Isn't that weird?