Quotes About Understanding

In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.

Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.

When someone says 'Id explain but its complicated.' I'm not offended they think so little of me, I'm offended they think so much of themselves.

Never praise a sister to a sister in the hope of your compliments reaching the proper ears.

No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.

You can always tell a real friend: When you make a fool of yourself, he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.

One measure of friendship consists not in the number of things friends can discuss, but in the number of things they need no longer mention.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and it annoys the pig.

I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is the language I don't understand.

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'

If only you would be altogether silent! For you, that would be wisdom.

It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife.

Ou don't realize how easy this game is until you get up in that broadcasting booth.

If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're...you're...booty call!

No one will win the battle of the sexes, there is too much flirting with the enemy.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.

A married man should forget his mistakes; no use two people remembering the same thing.

The key to a good relationship is the key. Give me back the key.

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is intended-and not to take a hint when a hint is not intended.

Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.

Families with babies, and families without babies are sorry for each other.

My friend has a baby, I am recording all the noises he makes so I can later ask him what he meant.