Quotes About Understanding

One way to take charge with difficult people in a poisoned atmosphere is to purposely blend with their body posture, facial expressions, and degree of animation. Blending sends the signal that "I'm with you! I'm not the enemy! I'm interested in what you say and do!

If you fail to blend with other people's voice volume and speed, you will probably end up talking to yourself or dealing with serious misunderstanding.

For this reason, masterful communicators make it their goal to listen and understand first, before attempting to be heard and understood.

In fact, there can be no doubt that when people have the experience that they've been listened to and understood, they let go of their preoccupation with their own thoughts and feelings. The door to their mind swings open, and that makes it much easier for them to hear you.

Step 2. Backtrack. One form of giving feedback is backtracking, or repeating back some of the actual words that other people are using. This sends a clear signal that you are listening and that you consider what the other people are saying to be important.

Step 3. Clarify. Having heard what they have to say, begin to gather information about the meaning of their communication.

As a general principle, it is probably better to do more clarifying than less, even when you think you do understand what people are saying. All too often, people think they understand what other people are saying when, in fact, they do not. Also, asking a specific question doesn't mean you automatically get a specific answer. Both the Whiner and the No Person tend to speak in sweeping generalizations.

Step 5. Confirm. Having listened carefully, you've now arrived at a crucial juncture. Rather than assuming anything, be certain that the difficult people are satisfied that the problem has been fully voiced. Ask, "Do you feel understood? Is there anything else?" When enough sincere questioning, listening, caring, and remembering are brought together, understanding is achieved, and difficult people become less difficult and more cooperative.

Ask yourself what positive purpose might be behind people's communications or behaviors, and acknowledge it. If you are not sure about the positive intent, just make something up. Even if the intent you try to blend with isn't true, you can still get a good response and create rapport.

If you're dealing with people who you perceive want to get it done as their top priority, and if in your conversations with them, you acknowledge this and your communications with them are brief and to the point so as not to obstruct them, you will increase cooperation and decrease misunderstanding.

If you're dealing with people who you perceive want to get it right as their top priority, and if in your conversations with them, you acknowledge this and you pay great attention to the details in your communications with them, you will increase cooperation and decrease misunderstanding.

Use "I" language. "From my point of view" and "The way I see it" are softening phrases that take the fight out of your words. They tell your difficult people that what you're expressing is your truth, rather than claiming to be the truth. This

When I'm at a Chinese restaurant having a hard time with chopsticks, I always hope that there's a Chinese kid at an American restaurant somewhere who's struggling mightily with a fork.

Not compromising isn't the same thing as being unreasonable.

Reading is how we learn to attach ourselves to ourselves, and to others, and to the world: reading inhabits us with the tendrils of love.

To look at those (few) books in the dawning recognition that what they furnish is not a room, but a self.

What is so addictive about fiction is that it is the one reliable place in which we can apprehend and participate in - fully understand - the inward world of another person.

Reading exposes is to the experiences and minds of others, makes us challenge our own provinciality, deepens and widens who we are and what we can become.

13 Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by his good behavior his works in the humility of wisdom.

We receive life by coming to Him. The life that is on a solid foundation is not just one that understands doctrine accurately, but is one that is joined to the Word Himself. It is not just knowing the Book of the Lord, but knowing the Lord of the Book. However, because He is Truth, we must love the truth and be passionately devoted to accuracy of doctrine as well.

The life that is on a solid foundation is not just one that understands doctrine accurately, but is one that is joined to the Word Himself. It is not just knowing the Book of the Lord, but knowing the Lord of the Book.

Chits knew no ideology.

Humility stops you from overestimating your own significance and it enables you to accept, understand, and live with failures and learn from them constructively.

My father used to say that knowledge is knowing tomatoes are fruits, and wisdom is not adding tomatoes to a fruit salad.